"good for me that I have storm and he not :)"
-Necrosausage!
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| My encounter with (a) Cronic. (headache) and my meeting with a Duke(Dude1) | | | Author: | | | IP: | dsc06.ivXXXX | | Date: | 08/17/02 12:08 | | Game Type: | Warcraft 3 | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 2, Max: 6, Min: 6
Lifetime Rating for demon_blade3: 6.0000 |  |
My encounter with (a) Cronic.(headache) and my meeting with a Duke(Dude1).
Hello and welcome to my second attempt at a decent battle report, this time I'm reporting on the very honorable game Warcraft III (yay). This game takes place on the small, popular, strategetic, and very fun Lost Temple. It was an arranged team game, with my clan member The_Zylo, and this was our first clan game :-D. I am assuming that everyone knows this map so I won't put up the mini-map for you, and if you don't know it, then I'm sorry. no i'm not, get the fuck away from me Anyway, as this is only my second BR, and I am just learning html, plz excuse any mistakes I have made and I'm sorry if I've made the game too hard to follow. this time i am 8(
The players
Today's players consist of me, orcish_blade3 (a.k.a. demon_blade3, and in this BR orcish for short) starting at the east side (3 o'clock position, right hand side, what have you), and my partner The_Zylo, just south of me (6 o'clock, bottom, whateva), and we are pretty good team members and clan members (my clan). Then there's the enemy: Cronic. (Cronic isn't green, he is blue but i like this blue text in here and it would be hard to follow him as a "blue" text guy), north of the map (12 o'clock, upward ho!) and DukeDude1, with powers of deducton you should figure out where he is. If your a stupid idiot, then I'll tell you: Left side, 9 o'clock, west, get it got it good?
These two were both a whopping level 4, against orcish_blade3 and The_Zylo who were level 1's. *shudder*. I like talking in the third person on B.Net, so I guess I will here.
Part 1: Pre-Action Action
After discussing the unfair match up they had been given, orcish_blade3 and The_Zylo actually decided to do some stuff, such as building and training peons. The_Zylo decided to get his arse moving and got an Altar of Elders, Ancient of War and Moonwell, while orcish_blade3 went the more "save some money way" and just built an Altar of Storms and burrow. Looking back, DukeDude1 had used the same build as The_Zylo with a barracks (crypt), altar and food source(ziggurat),
while Cronic. had gone same as orcish_blade3, with altar and food source. This conservative approach led orcish to more peons until he had enough money for a barracks. At this time, a sneaky owl sent by a newly created enemy Priestess of the Moon was spyng on orcish. Enter these messages:
orcish_blade3:Say, that's a purty owl you got there Cronic.
Cronic.:Thnx, this means we rush you first :D
orcish_blade3:I know :(
Enter The_Zylo
Too busy worrying about an impending attack, orcish busily builds towers without noticing The_Zylo's exploration efforts with his many, many huntresses with 1/1 upgrades (show off). Right now, orcish had about 4 grunts and two troll headhunters with 1/0 upgrade for the grunts, and none for the trolls. DukeDude1 has also gone ahead and has 1/1 upgrades for his ghouls, while Cronic. is as slow as orcish with 1/0 upgrades. orcish ups his attack upgrades for his grunts, and also decides to upgrade to tier 2, jump starting ahead of everyone else. Defenses are put up for orcish and he decides to go creep, making up for the time he wasted sitting around waiting for an attack. He picks a fight with some trolls to the south of him, and heads back home when he's done. orcish's defenses should keep him alive if an attack comes, and still worried about an attack, orcish doesnt notice The_Zylo heading out to the middle to hunt the creeps by the fountain of life.
Damn you! Enter Cronic. and DukeDude1
About now The_Zylo and DukeDude1 had started on tier 2, and orcish had finished with his stronghold (upgrade of Great Hall) Also the upgrades are now pretty good, with orcish at 2/1 with his grunts, The_Zylo at 2/1 (showoff), DukeDude1 at 2/1 (bitch), and Cronic. at 1/1 (haha idiot). Speaking of them....  Apparently, Cronic. and DukeDude1 had organized the rush (the suspense was killing me) and were at the fountain of life, where The_Zylo had sent his troops. The two (well, 1 and a half) armies clashed but The_Zylo has an advanatge, with his many, many hunts at 2/2 huntresses some fragile DukeDude1ghouls at 2/1 (with 2/2 coming) and a small force of Cronic. huntresses at 1/1. It takes the idiot orcish awhile to help his ally (confusing the game is 8/ ). orcish_blade3 goes off to help, but gets caught up with some stupid azz gnolls, and he fights them.  *Smack*.Orcish smacks himself in the head. If he had not bothered to stop fighting those creeps and go help out
The_Zylo the battle would've been lost, though his hero did get to level 2 (now he's got mirror image level 1 and critical strike level 1). He charges past the bloody carcasses of the gnolls, and heads straight to the battle, where he succeeds in bringing down the angry ghouls and cathces up with a level 3 Dreadlord. DukeDude1's ghouls are now at 2/2, and orcish is at 2/1 with his grunts, though grunts and huntresses (along with ANY other unit for that matter) are way stronger than ghouls and The_Zylo, with the aid of the mighty orcish bring down the massed ghouls. Massing ghouls may sound like a good idea, and even with 2/2 upgrades it isnt. The things are fragile as hell. DukeDude1's dreadlord runs and runs around the fountain. But, DukeDude1's level 3 hero is no match against orcish's blademaster with critical strike, taking one last hit (with 104 damage)  , and the forces of Cronic. run away like the sissie night elves they are, while DukeDude1 has nothing to run away with. The enemy is gone and the day is saved (well, at least saved for team 1), and now it's up to our heros to decide whether to fight
on and attack the enemie's base, or wait and gain more troops. Orcish says, "Screw this! Let's go fight!"
Actually it went kinda like this:
The_Zylo:So should we attack?
orcish_blade3:'k.
Enter the Insult
Through the temple and up the ramp, to Grandmother's house we go...Okay well anyway orcish's little force and The_Zylo's bigger force head up north to the bitch Cronic., and they are met with little resistance, even with Cronic. finally managing to get his troops to 1/2. orcish has also finsished his Tier 3 upgrade of his Fortress, and starts getting some shamans w/ bloodlust (hehehe). There were only a few huntresses and archers defending Cronic., though the moonwells were kind of annoying for our heroes  . Orcish and The_Zylo succeed in bringing down some moonwells before orcish_blade3 remembers something at the start of the game.....
flaaaaaaaaashbaaaaaaaack:
orcish_blade3:Say, that's a purty owl you got there Cronic.
Cronic.:Thnx, this means we rush you first :D
orcish_blade3:I know :(
Hehehe he thinks to himself, and he opens the chat box for "All Players"
btw this is sarcasm,I didn't leave out a rush
orcish_blade3:Ohh ow Cronic that rush really hurt me so bad :p
Cronic.:don't rub it in my face :(
orcish_blade3:I'm sorry...you did good hehe no he didnt
sorry about not capturing the screens with the message in it, I didnt think I'd write a BR about this game. Oh yeah if you found this you win a million dollars :D
Worth the Effort (ya bastard)
Anyway after that orcish and The_Zylo find their little party crashed (attacked) by roudy teenagers (ghouls) with kegs of beer on their backs (trees and/or logs) . There were a heck of a lot of them, and they managed to force The_Zylo into teleporting away (dunno why he did). orcish_blade3 was left alone with them but orcish didn't t.p. (cause ghouls are fuggin weak) and he killed them off. DukeDude1's dreadlord had also come to crash the party (DukeDude1 took his sweet sweet time reviving him) after his ghouls were gone, but again he met orcish's blademaster's blade (orcish's blademaster's blade, say that three times fast)
By this time (because orcishwas stupid and ignorant) Cronic.'s Priestess of the Moon had been revived, and he was still pumping out huntresses and archers. Again, they were hardly a match, and The_Zylo had returned with full force. They killed off Cronic.'s hero and units, but there were still the
trees (ancients ya moron). Cronic, was smart and had his Ancient of War (2 of them) and Tree of Eternity uprooted, and he was focused on orcish's blademaster. Cronic. suceeded in killing off some of his enemy, and nearly destroying the blademaster, and could've done it too if it weren't for orcish_blade3's mad runnin' away skillz. The ancients were destroyed and the rest of the Moonwells were blown up, and orcish_blade3 started work on some shamans w/ bloodlust and some catapults, as he knew what was coming. Just to make sure, orcish sent a troll headhunter off to the gold mine to the east of what used to be Cronic.'s main to see if an expansion had been raised. But the troll was only met by some more trolls, thus proving that Cronic. was a noob. Take no offense to that ya loser.yeah I'm a loser too since I didn't expand but I actually won the game.
Is DukeDude1 Not Turtley Enough for the Turtle Club?
Cronic. has left the game.
 Yay!The title screams out what happens now if your that dumb. Nearly ANY undead player will turtle himself in his base if he's in a mess, and it was no different for DukeDude1'. orcish_blade3 was smart and he brought out the catapults. This is where things start to go uphill (the projectiles from the catapults :) ). The orcish catapults can't get close enough to the spirit towers without some mofo pack of ghouls coming out to rip apart the 'pults. The_Zylo Stays with the catapults to attack any moron idiotic enough to run down the ramp, while orcish goes off to the other side and finds DukeDude1's expansion. :P. With the help of bloodlust, the exp. is down pretty quickly, and now DukeDude1 is in a bad position. He has no new source of income if his current mine runs out, so he decides to fight.
The lil' bastard has lot's of necros, and he intends to use them  . Ghouls and necros come charging down the ramp, and as ghouls die skellies are raised. orcish races down back to his ally and fight the skellies off (and looking at the replay, I thought this was a diversion to get the mine back, but nooo). The catapults are sent in, orcish draws the enemy out by hitting DukeDude1's new Death Knight  . The ghouls then proceed to rip the 'pults apart while The_Zylo rips through them with huntresses. He also has his own siege weapons with him, the Ballista. Our team decides it's now or never, and an all out assault is set on DukeDude1. Many buildings destroyed, many units lost, many pretty spells such as Bladestorm and Starfall. orcish_blade3's blademaster is down to just a few health cause of the spirit towers so he tries runs away (again). But, alas, one last spirit shot from a spirit tower (okay, what's a spirit made of that makes it hurt so much?) hits the BM and he dies (so...damn.....CLOSE!) . It's at this point that orcish_blade3 and The_Zylo are looking bad, as the necros of DukeDude1 are still alive and making skellies out the wazoo. Time for an orcish motivational speach:
orcish_blade3:Why don't you just spare us the trouble and quit?
DukeDude1 has left the game.
Post Action....Boredom?
Of course, GG's were said before that, and all in all it had been a good game, as i hardly ever win arranged team games. I don't think I've ever played with a better person, and I've never been better myself. The last 5 minutes were my least favorite (dang spirit towers), and the battle at the Fountain of Life was annoying too (next time, run away from the healing stuff). But my favorite part would have to be my insult (hey, the rest of the game was crap). I wouldn't know why you would want to see the replay, but I have it anyway if you do. You can reach me at demon_blade3@msn.com if you want it (god knows why), or if you just want to talk, rant, bitch about your life, bitch about me, or anything else you can e-mail me. It's cool if you wanna, all i get is junkmail (usually free porn offers, but I'm a good 14 year old so I don't look 0:) and yes I am actually 14 years old, I'm probably more mature than most of you even :p ). Now for the:
Lessons Learned:
- If your ally is going off exploring, be ready in like LESS than three seconds to help him
- Do not fear the higher levels!
- If someone boasts that they are gonna rush you, they are idiots, like me
- I'm a sarcastic jackass
- I hate undead players who are about to lose
Here are some things I should do:
Plans for next Battle Reports:
- Make a good background
- Put screen shots in different sections, instead of a lot in one part
- Break down the big parts into smaller paragraphs
- Report on a better game (of warcraft III, of course!)
- Get some sleep instead of staying up all nightdamn I'm tired
- Make pictures smaller
- I think I should go into what I had been building in my base while the action was happenning, as you may not have known when I might have started getting a shaman or something.
- Put borders around pics and br itself.
- detail, details, details ya bitch
- I dunno why your reading this part or even why I put it in here. If there's anything else I should work on please tell me.
And now some people I'd like to thank:
- The_Zylo, for volunteering to join my clan when it started and for being a great friend and clan member (I'm such a suckup).
- LuckyNewbie:p, his "This aint starcraft" report was the first I ever saw on battlereports.com (and so far, my favorite) and it motivated me to try new and challenging things, like battle reporting (you got something brown on your nose)
- TIME, for motivating me to NOT post stupid jokes I steal off the net and go work on battle reports (*cough*suckup*cough*)
- The whole staff at Battlereports.com, for making suck a kick-azz site to post and view replays and b.r.'s (okay,you've gone too far)
- Of course, Rook, for looking very cool looking (would you stop now, your embarrassing yourself)
- Myself, for finally agreeing with my brain to learn html and to be patient with making this report (ahhh, your welcome)
You win a million dollars if you found my other hidden words
Well that's it! I hope you enjoyed it 'cause I looked at the replay at least ten times taking notes, mostly at middle of night (lots of stuff to do in the evenings). Plus I absolutely had to learn html, for one: It's useful, two: i want to make battlereports, and three: my clan site needs hella help. This report only took me about three days, and I rushed through it cause school is coming up (high school for that matter), and I need to get prepared and get this over with. If I had the time I could've done the things I put here
PEACE!
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