"I said "This shit is gay as T_Mac" at work and my sergeant said "Yes sir, it sure as hell is." I'm pretty sure he doesn't know T_Mac, but you never know..."
-Mark4
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| Black And White | | | Author: | | | IP: | dt0f9n8dXXXX | | Date: | 05/10/01 06:05 | | Game Type: | Other | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 2, Max: 7, Min: 6
Lifetime Rating for ::novody::: 6.5000 |   | Warning: this report has a lot of pics. It may take them a while to load, but no matter how slow your connection is, I guarantee it took me longer to make these pics than it’ll take you to load them…so quit yer bitchin’ and go grab some food if you are impatient :D
I know its been a while since I’ve done a report, so I hope all of you still know who I am =o Ive been doing all sorts of crazy stuff, including getting ready for college, so I’ve been busy…ive also been trying out new games: MGS2 demo (ooh lah lah) and Zone of the Enders for my PS2. Oni on the comp…etc….
I also got a new game that this report is based around. (sorry, no SC!) For those of you who have been frozen in an iceberg and haven’t heard of Black and White, it’s a game where you are a god (yea, a god :D) and your job is to watch over some whiny villagers. You also get a cool creature that you train to go stuff and he helps to watch over the villagers. Oh, and YOU are basically a hand (the hand of god, duh). You grab the landscape and pull/push to move around and u can pet/slap your creature.
The catch is that there is no right or wrong, its u to YOU. So if you want to be an evil god, that’s just peachy. In fact, you’re creature takes on you’re personality and if you are evil, your creature will be too and he will start to look more evil as the game progresses. If you are good, the creature will be nice and look more angelic as the game goes on. Basically it’s a game just to mess with some pretty good AI programming…like a Tomagatchi (or whatever) for the big kids :P
The game I am about to present only shows the first level of the game…it get cooler later on (fireballs, lightning miracles, etc.) but I just wanted to give u guys a taste for the game. Also, this game isn’t a real game I played :P I kinda made it up, but it’s a composite of a bunch of my experiences :D Anyway, without further ado…
So here I am, the new god of this tiny little world…the first obvious choice before me is: Shall I be good or evil?? I pondered it for a bit but the choice wasn’t too hard…most of you who know me know that, for the most part, Im a pretty nice guy :P Im also a sucker for helping people, so I decided I’d be a good god for my poor villagers.
My first task was to help them build my temple, which seemed like a great idea, so I brought wood over to them like a nice god and made some of them into disciple builders. You make people into disciples by picking them up and placing them next to the task u want them to perform (and u can make “disciple breeders” by placing people next to other people of the opposite sex. That’s right, u can make the people have SEX muahahha *cough* ..um…not like that gives me a weird power trip…um…never…)
So the villagers made me a temple…not great, but cozy.
So the next major task is to go select my creature…woohoo! So this dumb villager makes me go find some stones and crap so I can open the gates to go get my creature (im a frickin god! Why the heck cant I just open the gates with a word?? :/ and why is this villager smarter than I am? Oh wait…its just a game. Shit.)
So I go get the stones and open these gates…yada yada… and I get to pick one creature from three choices:
The Monkey- Kinda lame looking, but supposedly the smartest creature…therefore it learns quickly and doesn’t do as many dumb things. The most neutral of the 3.
The Tiger- The strongest of the 3 creatures, but it has a tendency to do evil things and isn’t as intelligent.
But me, being good (and a total idiot) pick…
…yea, the cow. The cow is supossed to be nice and loving, but he is a complete dipshit. COMPLETELY STUPID. I mean seriously. At least he looks kinda funny.
I had found some beach balls lying around and was trying to teach him how to play catch (warning for people who buy play the game: don’t try to teach ur creature much on the first level…he doesn’t learn a lot till later) But it basically had no interest in the ball and stuck a defiant pose with me:
So there I was, being a good god and watching my village (called “nowhere” boo-yah!) I did a few of the side quests and was pretty nice to the incompetent villagers (“Go find my sheep cuz im a lazy-ass, god” and “Save my brother cuz hes sick and wandered off like an idiot, god.” god this and god that…u’d think I had nothing better to do than clean up after their petty problems)
Heres a pic to give u a nice overview of my happy village:
the cool thing was that they were worshiping me…mmm…power…they might be stupid, but at least they know where their priorities lie :D hmm…that’s not exaclt the thing a good god would think…
Suddenly it hit me…maybe I wasn’t shaping up to be a good god at all…after all, my creature was an idiot and my villagers were all whiners…maybe I was going to be a bit more evil :D kekeke
It only took one event to confirm this change. I went to check up on my cow, when I saw something in the back of the courtyard of MY temple. No…it couldn’t be…
yes, its true, my cow had pooped on my temple. This was the last straw. I slapped him around for a good 20 minutes then made him eat the poop (yea, u can DO that) damn cow, pooping on my temple, see if he ever does THAT again! (funny thing is, in the game if u wanna be good u teach him to poop in the fields…b4 I realized this in another one of my games, I spend half an hour trying to teach him to throw his poop in the ocean :P)
My first order of business as an newly transformed evil god was to do what any evil god would do:
Chase the villagers with trees!
The funny thing about doing something crazy like this is that part of the game is to gain belief from the villagers…well, when a huge tree comes flying at a bunch of them, you gain a heck of a lot of belief!!
So I did the whole “chase the frightened villagers around with big evergreens” routine for a while before I decided I needed to try something new. And no sport is more suited to the gods than good ol bowling. The great thing about this game is that you can interact with almost anything: tress, rocks, houses, people, whatever u want. Heres a pic or a rock “interacting” with a house >:D
Its almost like im doing a god photo album now :P
Heres a pic of me throwing people at houses:
Oh, and heres a good one of me throwing people into the ocean:
So finally, I seceded to go do some side quests as and evil god. The first one I met this Hippy guy wanted me to play some music on some stones…
…So I destroyed his house.
Then he yelled at me for breaking his house, which is a pretty stupid thing to do to a god, so I played the music on the rocks…by throwing him at the rocks.
The second side quest was a hick dood. He basically told me that he didn’t believe in me and he never worship me unless I did some huge miracle to convince him…
So I thought…
…and thought…
…and I figured the best miracle I could convince him with was his own untimely demise. I tossed him up and down a cliff till my good conscience (the guy in the picture) got mad at me.
Well, that’s about it for my BR…my good conscience’s last quote kinda sums up how I turned out :P hehe It really gives you some respect for the God in the real world (or whatever you want to believe in) Its not an easy job, and I know that I certainly wouldn’t be the man for the job! Kekeke
The basic purposes of this BR were:
a) show people Black and White
b) allow Nobo to do a BR
c) allow Nobo to make pics again
d) allow Nobo to be a comment whore
e) for you to comment
f) say that he has a really good SC BR in the works…it was such a good game that ill try to get the BR done soon…
g) tell everyone that hes been working on Anime Music videos…I have a music video to Fuel’s “Innocent” that uses clips from Lain…my friend is teaching me how to encode it well, and then ill post it for everyone to view…im happy with how it turned out :D
As a bonus, I include here 2 conversations I had with Jamellan and TheRubberDucky about Black and White…they are kinda funny :P
TheFirstNobody: =o
Jamellor: howdy
TheFirstNobody: i saw ur post in the forum :D my BR is gonna be on B&W :D
Jamellor: haha, that's what i was thinking. so how far are u into the game?
TheFirstNobody: i sux :D
TheFirstNobody: im only on the second level
Jamellor: they stolen yer creature yet?
TheFirstNobody: im trying to be good, but its hard
TheFirstNobody: not yet :P
Jamellor: ah, yer on the lvl b4 that
Jamellor: in order to beat the rescue creature level i had to be evil to take the last village
TheFirstNobody: heheh
Jamellor: just cause i gained belief points really friggin slow trying to be nice!!!!
TheFirstNobody: yea :/
Jamellor: so those gay villagers asked for it~!
TheFirstNobody: its hard
Jamellor: shitloads of fireballs and boulders
Jamellor: then i gave em food and wood to repair
Jamellor: that seemed to work :P
TheFirstNobody: LMAO
TheFirstNobody: i like throwing the people around :P
Jamellor: hehe
Jamellor: are you any good at training your creature to do stuff?
Jamellor: cause i suck at it
TheFirstNobody: im gettting better
TheFirstNobody: he throws trees in the village store for me :D
Jamellor: DAMN!
Jamellor: my creature does shit!
Jamellor: and i don't know how to train him
Jamellor: only thing i taught him was not to eat ppl :-(
TheFirstNobody: walk him around on the leash all the time
TheFirstNobody: and do stuff while hes on the leash cuz then he watches
TheFirstNobody: like i put him on the leash
TheFirstNobody: and threw a bunch of trees in the store
TheFirstNobody: and he learned
TheFirstNobody: he also casts miracles :D
TheFirstNobody: but u gotta hav ethe leash on him
Jamellor: yea i taught him to do the food miracle, but he never casts it
Jamellor: maybe that's it
TheFirstNobody: im also trying to teach him to shit in the fields :P
Jamellor: hehe i had a wierd experience with that
TheFirstNobody: ducky says he taught his to catch and throw fireballs ;P
Jamellor: he took a dump in the town center so i beat him for it...
TheFirstNobody: keke
Jamellor: then as i was throwing the terds outta the town center, he was trying to catch them
Jamellor: it was wierd :P
TheFirstNobody: LMAO
TheFirstNobody: but
TheFirstNobody: u are tteaching him to play catch!
Jamellor: it was even nastier when i first started playing
Jamellor: he took a dump then ate it, puked it up, then went to sleep on the terd pile
TheFirstNobody: omfg
TheFirstNobody: lmao
Jamellor: what creature did u pick?
TheFirstNobody: i tried to teach him to throw his turds in the water
TheFirstNobody: b4 i ralized he should poop in the field :P
TheFirstNobody: cow :D
Jamellor: hehe
TheFirstNobody: u?
Jamellor: i think i need to start over
Jamellor: cause i'm fucked on this mission
Jamellor: i picked the tiger
TheFirstNobody: nice
Jamellor: hehe, on the first mission he ate like 20 people before i noticed :P
TheFirstNobody: hahaha
wurldh8r: Wow you get on late too
TheFirstNobody: heh ocasionally :D
TheFirstNobody: had a school dance tonight
wurldh8r: ah
TheFirstNobody: so i got home not long ago
wurldh8r: =D
wurldh8r: Have fun?
TheFirstNobody: yea, it was a lot of fun
TheFirstNobody: im on the 2nd level in B&W keke
wurldh8r: ^^
wurldh8r: gogoogo nobo
wurldh8r: My evil sheep
TheFirstNobody: its a pain to be good
wurldh8r: is just finishing the second level now
TheFirstNobody: keke
wurldh8r: right before where i stop playing now
wurldh8r: coz of silly 3rd level
TheFirstNobody: omfg i get frustrated being nice
TheFirstNobody: takes so long
TheFirstNobody: i save the game
TheFirstNobody: then torch the towns
TheFirstNobody: then feel better
TheFirstNobody: then try to be good again :D
wurldh8r: ^^
wurldh8r: being good
wurldh8r: is for sissies
TheFirstNobody: kekeke
wurldh8r: and nobodies
TheFirstNobody: tru!
wurldh8r: omg, your a nobody^^
TheFirstNobody: own!
Well, that’s it for this BR!
love you all, have a nice day :D
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