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"Les 'Terrans' est tres homosexuel"
-T_mac


Fixed version of Smurfy 2on2 Do not read the one below sorry
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Author:Joe.Smurf
IP:pm1-25.sXXXX
Date: 02/18/01 02:02
Game Type: Starcraft
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Report Rating: 8.0, # of Ratings: 2, Max: 8, Min: 8
Lifetime Rating for Joe.Smurf: 7.6667









Due to Technical difficulties with Geocities, saving, and microsoft word. I somehow posted an unedited version. Im sorry for anyone that read through that it was a waste of your time. Please any Administrators who read this Delete the previous Battlereport. Thank you again.


Hi Hi Sup everyone

Whats Cracking

well this is my 3rd report and I feel I have used all my Battlereporting knowledge on this one. Since my last one was not that great I was determined to do better this time. One thing u need for a Good report is a Good game and that’s one thing I got ..



It was a dark and Stormy night ..

Once upon a time…

A long time ago…




Ok I cant think of any good cheesy opening lines so lets just get on with it…


Well it was a Friday night and Me Dino Sgt Khas and flozzy were in channel smurfs enjoying our company talking about some Smurfy thing or other.. When my incredible powers of observation noticed we had 6 ppl in the channel I immediately thought 3on3 then I remembered one of our 6 was a bot ooo 5-1 == 4 Woo hoo umm so 2:2 Woo Hoo ok.. yeah so I would Observe We all set forth into the game Temple was a lil played out SO I chose The bobs obs Rivalry map I had. Everyone was Ready to have a good battle but then they told me I couldnt report it ?? They said they didn’t play well in important games ?? So I did what anyone would dO ? I started the game And Fibbed a bit ^_^ and Now I hope u Enjoy…..




First since the .Smurf clan is decidedly Small and exclusive We are not to well known So a player intro is inline

Sgt.Smurf founded the Clan around 2 years ago. He has always been a gosu terran player and many of us
learned from him as our model. Sgt.Smurfs a real cool guy and a Good leader.

Dino.Smurfis one funny ass kid hes a very good player but turns his skill on and off like a faucet, He’s been with us for a long time now and we all love him.

Khas.Smurf is our resident Candian(typo intentional) and proud of it. (I don’t know why..) Me n him always have fun arguing over why canada sux. Hes a good player that’s always got a trick up his sleeve.

Flozzy.Smurf Is a cool guy who is a Great Zerg player. He is always honing on Strategies he’s much better 1on1 than 2on2. but only time will tell how he fares in this match.



The map is Rivalry if u don’t know it then u don’t belong at this site =/
The positions and colors were as followed





















Sgt.Smurf low right orange

Khas.Smurf low left purple

Flozzy.Smurf top right

Dino.Smurf top left tealred



Everyone starts off well with no absurdities among there ranks over there workers sexual orientation



After everyone has cloned there workers I wish everyone luck and tell them not to worry I wont be Battlereporting..



Flozzy.Smurf starts out with a 5 pool as his partner Dino.Smurf walls In. Meanwhile Sgt.Smurf and Khas.Smurf are following rather basic orders, Khas.Smurf with a 2 gate pylon , gas and Sgt.Smurf with a supply/rax wall to keep out small units (such as lings )~~foreshadow with another rax and gas. As soon as Flozzy.Smurf sends his lings he makes a creep I’m not sure why but he did anyway. He would continue to be paranoid about defense and obsessed with creep colonies the rest of the game. Flozzy.Smurfs lings Go down to visit Sgt.Smurf but find no marine, nothing but a supply and a rax, a supply and rax that are
surprisingly close. The lings beat on the supply but Sgt.Smurfs quick eye allows him 4 scvS on the job repairing and the supp only goes to the low yellow before a rine pops out and scares the lings off. The lings not wanting to be as useless as they really were, went on to Khas.Smurfs base he had sent his first zealot to scout Dino.Smurfs wall which was now being guarded by a marine who was swearing at the zealot as it walked home. So the lings found only 1 zealot at the ramp. They beat on it till it was red and surprisingly both Khas.Smurf and Flozzy.Smurf pulled there troops apart simultaneously. The zealot regroups inside the main while the 5 lings that are left go up the ramp and make there way into the mineral line. They smack 2 probes really hard which in turn let out an agonizing beeps and explode. The probes don’t like this and surround the lings, the lings fight with the 3 new zealots and manage to kill the first heavily damaged one but then die to the overwhelming feeling u get when your toe falls asleep thnx to the probes.

During this time Flozzy.Smurf has about 9 drones and a creep colony. He is feeling the effects of that early pool after it did so little damage even though if Sgt.Smurf had not been gosu with his wallin the game woulda ended then.

Flozzy.Smurf and lays another hatch.

Dino.Smurf has started dual factories and adds one more to his line.

Sgt.Smurf has his academy finished 2 rax pumping and added a factory and a starport. Khas.Smurf has 4/5 zealots and has added a cybercore and will soon start a citadel for templar tech.

Meanwhile Sgt.Smurf has built up a force of 10 rines and 2 medics and is enroute to Flozzy.Smurf. Khas.Smurf starts a Stargate and a Templar archives for the Feared DT/Sair combo. Dino.Smurf is having way to much fun mining up his base, but they will eventually be useful as he brings his unit count to 3 tanks and 6 vultures. Khas.Smurf sends his first 2 sairs and first 2 Dt to test Dino.Smurfs D. Dino.Smurfs only

form of detection is Flozzy.Smurfs ol wich is soon BleraaahH! Ed into a gooey mass of ickyness. The Dts bring the Rax into the red. The vults feeling really stupid they didn’t mine the ramp yet place mines at the nearest corners of the Rax. One mine immediately hops up and skitters toward The Dark one bringing both shields down. Dino.Smurf lifts his rax when its at only 100 hp left and the Dt stumble in seperately. One hits a mine immediately. The other one cleverly walks straight under the Rax and then sharply to the left, but eventually homes in on the only mine in the area and well.. yeah… no more Dt threat..

At the same time Sgt.Smurfs 12 infantry atttack on Flozzy.Smurf Fails badly vs 2 sunkens and a handful of lings as Flozzy.Smurf comes from top and bottom with the lings killing 2 marines right away.

Dino.Smurf floats a Cc he has made to the 12 position.
Khas.Smurfs 2 sairs are there and attack it before it sets down.

Meanwhile Sgt.Smurf has a Science vessel very fast and is sending another 12 infantry plus a tank to Flozzy.Smurfs base. As they arrive with corsairs support Sgt.Smurf finds out he forgot siege, putting his push on hold Doh!!

Khas.Smurf sends 3 more Dt to the 12 spot and slice at the Cc forcing it to lift and once its up the sairs are on it again. Dino.Smurf has an armory just completed and starts 3 goliaths while moving the Cc to a nearby turret for repairs. Flozzy.Smurf is desperately asking for assistance when he is really quite safe with his many.. many colonies. The Dts hold Dino.Smurf in until he scans and kills 2, the other retreats to 12.Dino.Smurf tries to alleviate his partner of the terran aggressor. Dino.Smurf rolls 3 tanks underneath the ramp below where Sgt.Smurf is camped above the ramp. The first shot by Sgt.Smurfs tanks hits a vulture and they all fly up the ramp while the tanks siege from below and the lings come from the side. Looks pretty bad for those rines and tank. The Tank is matrixed already and then irradiated! Killing 4or5 of the lings trying to kill the tank. The next volley of tank and vult fire take down the tank

During this time both Khas.Smurf and Sgt.Smurf have expanded Sgt.Smurf has dual engineering bays upgrading. Dino.Smurf has placed his Cc down at his nat, and Flozzy.Smurf has also started a hatch at his nat. Dino.Smurf has upgrades spinning from 2 armories. As does Flozzy.Smurf from his Evo. Khas.Smurf has 6-7 zealots 3-5 goons and 2 temps wit storm. Dino.Smurf moves out his assorted metal to the ramp north west of Khas.Smurf natural, and starts a push. Khas.Smurf scouts this with a Dt and throws up a canon or 2 to stall. Sgt.Smurf in an attempt to persuade Dino.Smurf to save his partner rather than pursue Khas.Smurf. Who, might not hold off Dino.Smurfs assault. Sgt.Smurf attacks Flozzy.Smurf with a small army of m&m and 2 tanks and an Sv. As they approach Flozzy.Smurfs nat they run into a mine field laid by dino. He laid them Anti terran style (mines packed together closely)but the Sv detects and they are shot without doing a thing except for pop 2 stupid medics who walk ahead of the infantry. With the loss of the medic Flozzy.Smurf can do more damage with his ten lings as he has now started lurker aspect and has 4 hydra waiting to morph. He then takes about 10 lings against 2 tank and 8 or so marines and brings Sgt.Smurfs attack down to 2 tanks and 2 marines, but reinforcements are enroute. Sgt.Smurf quickly sets in again with 1 more tank and 6 more infantry plus 1 medic. Sgt.Smurf sends his infantry and tanks in formation up to the hatch as they siege up close to the hatch. Flozzy.Smurf sends 10 or so lings ahead of the tank and infantry losing 5 without attacking anything. Stupid ? No it was a diversion so the lurkers cloud slip in behind the tanks without taking fire, and slip in they do. They burrow without a scratch thanks to the distracting lings. One lurker is irradiated as they burrow. As I watch I can tell Flozzy.Smurf orders 2 lurkers to attack the tank on the left side and the other 2 attack the tank on the right. the spines all intermingle right where the pack of infantry were standing and 7 marines and 1 medic perform the synchronized headroll. With 1 more volley the tanks are eliminated with no casualties to the lurkers except the irradiated 1.

As all this is happening Dino.Smurf has started pushing into Khas.Smurfs natural base with his assorted metal. His first Sv is shooed away by 3 sairs and 4 Dts walk in and kill 2 tanks before a Scan eliminates all 4. Soon goliaths are on the scene, and the push is looking well. Khas.Smurf makes the mistake of engaging the push while it was still on the ramp and loses most of his units soon after that Sgt.Smurf brings 2 tanks and sieges them above the ramp to Khas.Smurf main looking out over the bridge where Dino.Smurfs tanks are. As soon as Sgt.Smurf sieges the first shot from Sgt.Smurfs tanks draw 4 Shots from Dino.Smurfs. Dino.Smurfs tanks are now 1/1. One of Sgt.Smurfs tanks is blown to oblivion and the other is reduced to half HP. Khas.Smurf then sends in 3 zealots and hits the lead tank, wich was damaged by Sgt.Smurfs first tank. Dino.Smurfs tank goes down quickly, while Sgt.Smurf destroys another tank at the middle of the ramp with a shot from his high ground tank. The zealots receive more tank fire as they close in on the second tank. The combined splash plus about 2 hits from there psi blade leaves Dino.Smurf with one more tank down and Khas.Smurf looses all 3 zealots. Sgt.Smurf gets off a final shot with his tank killing one more tank before it is blasted back with 1 shot. In all it was very good teamwork trying to break the push, unfortunately Dino.Smurf held it together and had a steady stream of reinforcements during the battle. A few zealots try and pull victory from the jaws of defeat, but they are overwhelmed by the terran firepower. Khas.Smurf ferries his remaining troops, a few Dts, HTs, and zealots and all of his probes to sgts Expansion at mid 6. They then trek across the map to the 3 expansion to recolonize.

at the same time Sgt.Smurf has irradiated the 3 left over lurkers and has killed Flozzy.Smurfs expansion uncontested. Khas.Smurf flies his final probes to the 3 expansion and starts a nexus and a few pylons, while Dino.Smurf finishes cleaning out the rest of his main. Sgt.Smurf is now sieging up Flozzy.Smurfs ramp. All Flozzy.Smurf has is a control or 2 of lings and 5 or so lurkers Vs Sgt.Smurfs 4-5 tanks 2 svs and 20 or so infantry wich are now upgraded to 2/2. Flozzy.Smurf has upgraded ranged attack and carapace for a 2/1 hydra and lurker army. Sgt.Smurf sends his tanks as near up the cliff as he can get and the spots for the tanks with the Sv. Then he sends up 8 marines and a few meds to see if he can draw Flozzy.Smurfs initial attack. knowing that with so many marines on a ramp a mistake around the lurkers could mean trouble. Sgt.Smurf goes slow Flozzy.Smurf has 2 more lurkers that just finished morphing they burrow once they hatch, but are killed swiftly by siege tank and marine fire. The marines then draw 4-5 hydras and a handful of lings into the fray I can c that lag has taken toll on the micro in this battle. As Flozzy.Smurf has lost his formation so hoping he can still make some use of the lings and hydras death he sends in his 4 lurkers just as Sgt.Smurf brings 10 or so more marines up the ramp. The marines and lurkers equalize leaving alot of blood, 4 tanks, and 10 marines on the low ground. They quickly move up and block Flozzy.Smurf off .Sgt.Smurf used the ramp very well but Flozzy.Smurf may have faired better if not for the lag spike. Flozzy.Smurf having enough of trying to micro in the intense lag spikes shares his feelings with everyone.

When flozzys base is razed all except for a queens nest Dino.Smurf has eviscerated Khas.Smurf’ base but Khas.Smurf has already relocated and is mining at 3.


With so much action so Early here’s The mini-map and Ups
Update.



Back to the action. Dino.Smurf packs up his Demolition squad and rally at the bridge near the low mid 6 Expansion. He adds a few more units to his team before he assaults Sgt.Smurfs Exp. Sgt.Smurf has massed about 30 Marines 2 tanks and 5-6 medics at that spot. His rines are 2/3 and the Vehicle ups for Dino.Smurf are +1 armor +2 attack. I believe the ups alone gave Sgt.Smurf this battle, because it was very narrowly won. Many of Dino.Smurfs troops were lost initially when he tried to maneuver them all in close to the infantry. Trying to avoid that gosu single file line that we all hate =[. Sgt.Smurfs lead tank goes down first while dino’s siege up. The Goliath/vult move in close losing 4 of there number and the rest dish out equal casualties to there loss. Leaving Dino.Smurf down the hole with roughly 6 vultures and 5 goliaths. While Sgt.Smurf loses about 16 infantry. the remaining 8 rush towards the last 3 tanks kill 1, and are cut down to 4, they then squeeze in close to the final tanks wich are firing away at Sgt.Smurfs last tank. The tank has taken multiple +2 tank fire but hasn’t died because Sgt.Smurf has 8 scvs repairing it. During this battle.

Sgt.Smurf has secured the top left Nat and started a Cc. He then sets out to Dino.Smurfs completely naked 12 Expansion. The one he started after he took down Khas.Smurf main. As Sgt.Smurf takes down the 12 Expansion, Dino.Smurf attempts To take the 6 Exp from Sgt.Smurf.

Once again he is denied as he sends 4 tanks and 1 goliath vs a bunker filled and a Tank behind the bunker. The tank kills the lead tank while sieging wich was a costly error by Dino.Smurf. The Tank is then demolished by the 3 2/2 tanks, the bunker explodes. Suddenly a nasal Battle Cry fills the air as the Green haired Scvs Take arms against the tanks. The tanks don’t understand whats happening and are quickly surrounded by angry hicks with drills. Needless to say 20 or so Scvs > 3 tanks.

About this time a Cc Dino.Smurf has started at the 9 expansion has finished and he sends his surviving scvs from 12 there to start mining.
Sgt.Smurf sends his remaining forces plus a few tanks over the bridge and into Dino.Smurfs natural where they are promptly murdered by 3 2/3 tanks and 7 or so vulture. A Wraith thinks its gonna do something and takes a pot shot at a tank before 3 Goliaths knock its 0/0/0 ass outta the sky faster than a fat chick on a diving board. Dino.Smurf regains control of the area and attempts to push back over the 12 area to Sgt.Smurfs expansion at the top left nat.

During this time Flozzy.Smurf amuses everyone by accusing himself of hacking. Dino.Smurf has Completed a Cc at the low left Nat and it is immediately scouted by one of Sgt.Smurfs Scvs, The Scvs fight, and Dino.Smurf loses horribly to the 3/0 Fusion cutter of doom.

Meanwhile Dino.Smurf is starting to move in on Sgt.Smurfs top left Nat but is stalled by a Tank on the high ground above the bridge and a handful of infantry and 2 tanks guarding the Expansion. Dino.Smurf also rebuilds the a Cc at the 12 position.


Sgt.Smurf sends 6 rines and 2 meds down to the low left nat, and takes Down Dino.Smurfs unprotected cc there. Tanks and vultuers and goliaths are enroute but they wont make it in time.

Khas.Smurf has 4 stargates finished, and starts a Fleet beacon. While his sairs scout a Dino.Smurf cc at the middle of the map. Sgt.Smurf takes his force that just eliminated the low left Nat Expo and sends about 12 more rines from 6 To demolish the newly found Cc.

Sgt.Smurf enlists the help of 3 Starports and the difference is quickly made clear. Sgt.Smurf withheld another attempt on his Top right Cc with a Few cloaked Wraiths darting in and taking out the tanks will giving vision to the high ground tank over the bridge. Sgt.Smurf takes his Squad of Cc destroyers and attempts to breakthrough Dino.Smurfs territory underneath his nat. He’s met by 6 tanks and 3 goliaths and 5 Vultures but Sgt.Smurf has added a few more m&m 4 wraiths and 2 tanks the result is Sgt.Smurfs force is stopped dead and the cloaked wraiths are cleaned up with 2 volleys from the Goliaths.

During this battle however 8 carriers Descended on Dino.Smurfs main. Immediately killing his 2 armories the 7 3/3 Goliaths he currently has is not enough to take down the 8 0/0 Carriers and ggs are passed around as the Game comes to an End.


A very close score was the result of the 51 minute game.
Sgt.Smurf came up short in the Units and Structures but had around 10 k more in resources. Also Sgt.Smurf was producing out of 12 Buildings as opposed to Dino.Smurfs 6 factories and starport In the end I think it was Sgt.Smurfs Feverish attacking that Stalled a strong Force of mech.


Well hope u like it. Comment to your hearts desire I wanna thank my Smurfs for letting me report a great game. ( even though they didn’t really let me at all)

I'd Do a lessons learned here but people would just complain about it and stuff so its not really worth it=/. Besides my biggest lessons learned is that people dont like my lessons learned well anyway. hope u liked this and thnx for Reading. Sorry about the firs unedited report..

Peace







peace out my homies!

this has been a





Joe.Smurf
production

please respond to this post on our smurfboard

;) - out






























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