"Bitchin' Bengalaas!"
-~CattleBruiser~
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| I admit it i am a hacker! | | | Author: | | | IP: | XXXX | | Date: | 09/01/99 02:09 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | Starcraft(1), Text Only(1) | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 5, Min: 5
Lifetime Rating for Mylife4hire: 5.0000 |  | VITAL INFO:
Map: Rivalry
At 8 o'clock ExcalaberX (purple protoss)
At 2 o'clock [7]Blitz (brown terran)
Your hero weighing in at 150lbs 5'10'' and with the strength of 12 tigers:
At 11 o'clock Mylife4hire (white protoss)
And his trusty side kick:
At 5 o'clock looseinthecloset (yellow protoss)
(I don't know if I got the names right, but close enough)
This is all from memory and it is my first battle report (nopics i wasn't planning on writing one sorry!).
I was in nohunters as usual looking for a game and FINALLY Excalaberx and [7]blitz decide to challenge closet and I. Before we start the game we had a conversation that went like this:
Looseinthecloset: Me and hire right?
[7]blitz: *spams*
[7]blitz: *spams*
[7]blitz: *spams*
mylife4hire: I think so
[7]blitz: *spams*
[7]blitz: *spams*
mylife4hire: stop
[7]blitz: *spams*
[7]blitz: *spams*
[7]blitz: i can take you on 2v1 but ok
mylife4hire: with your 1200 ranking your prolly could but let's play anyways
(little does he know that i am a hacker)
[7]blitz: *spams*
[7]blitz: *spams*
The game commences:
The game started out pretty basic. My partner and i went for similar builds: the basic and boring 2pylon and 2 gateway build. We both scouted the enemy early on. My mighty probe found an scv building a Barracks and decided to have a conversation:
Probe: stand still so i can do you another 5 damage!
SCVs: Rush him! Fusion cutters away!
Probe: 60hp damn Blizzard! This is imbalance! *fearing the dreaded scv rush Mr. Probe runs away*
I retreat my probe and find that he is just beginning an early factory (heavy metal terran anyone?)
My partner scouts the enemy protoss to find that he is going early gas and teching to something... well we won't worry about that now (bad idea!). Instead we decide to stop Browns SCV rush before it starts. I think we rushed him with about 18 zealots altogether (gotta love toss cheese rush) & force him to relocate to his partners natural.
It was at about this time when my partner yells, "oh shit!!" I looked at the map and i didn't see any brown or purple coloring, so i figured he was just letting off some steam... But then again, "Oh shit!!" ACK! DTS! Geez! All has is one horribly placed cannon. I tell him to rebuild, build cannons, or do something! But alas, you can only do so much with 36 minerals. 400 min for a nexus? What a ripoff! Fortunately he still has about 8 zealots and 3 dragoons.
While he is going through this tragedy, being the team player that I am I decide to take the opportunity to expand to my natural and tech up to the mighty OBSERVERS!!!! Hmm I think these things should get guns or maybe even nukes. Because my trusty side kick has a formidable force, but no way of building more we decide that the time to strike is now! This might be our last chance! We both rush ALL of our forces down to engage the enemy. Unfortunately due to lack of communication and some pesky DTS it ended up to be two small battles which we horribly lost.
Right about now [7]blitz decided to pause the game for 5 min with no explanation and the 3 of us start chatting:
Closet: WTF, why did he pause
Me: That SOB said he could take us on 2v1
Closet: Asshole... Stupid DTs
Ex: He has only said one thing the entire game... "protect me."
Me: ROTF!
Ex: Well you guys are doing really good!
*i hope he doesn't realize that I have no forces at this point and my partner is dead*
Me: YEAH REALLY GOOD!
Closet: I am just flourishing over here how about you?
Me *just to Closet*: use those 15 probes that you still have and look for expansions!
Closet: Roger that!
All of a sudden without warning the game is unpaused and play resumes. All of closet's probes find NO expansions (except brown mining out his partners natural). But the 15 probes do manage to tear a marine to shreds! (WHOOOHOOOO!) He will not die in vain! It was at this time our nemesis decide to finish off my poor defenseless side kick and dear friend. Oh great a 2v1! Grrr! Well essentially it is like a 1.5v1 cause browns main was razed.
I do some brain storming, and I figure out that the only way I can win is if I expand like a bitch and prevent them from expanding. By this point I have about 8-10 observers and I send them to every expansion point in the map. I also expand to 12o'clock expansion and 2o'clock (browns old main). I go expansion hunting. It seems that these two like to start naked expansions. I must have killed about 5 expansion attempts in like 5 min! Unfortunately your hero could not prevent them from expanding to the 6 o'clock expansion.
I go heavy goons and high temps with storm until I here this:
Ex: You hack
Me: Huh? Me?
Ex: ya
*ex disconnects*
I have about 12 gateways pumping out dudes and browns terrans give one last ditch effort to finish me off and sends 10 tanks with a bunch of marines. I suck at micro and I lost like 20 goons to the 10 tanks! Stupid bridges! What the hell goons are you blind! I thought you are supposed to be elite troops! Ack! Then I hear this:
[7]blitz: You are such a hacker!
Me: no let me share vision i have observers all over the...
*[7]blitz drops*
Well I guess I do hack
LESSONS LEARNED
1. OBSERVERS=HACK
I would expect this from a pubbie, but nohunters peops?
Hope you like it comments flames welcome!!!!! |
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