"I don't survive very well, but I die spectacularly!"
-Judge Pag
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| The Most Unspectacular Game Ever | | | Author: | | | IP: | XXXX | | Date: | 08/15/99 11:08 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | Starcraft(1), Problem: Broken Images(1) | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 2, Max: 6, Min: 6
Lifetime Rating for Tub_Thumper: 6.0000 |  | The weather was calm on the isolated north continent of Tarsonis as a Renegade Zerg Swarm (played by my companion, CureBoi) and a Foolhardy Protoss Brigade (played by me, the lowly Tub_Thumper) allied to bring down two common terran foes. The map was Boxed In and the peasants were unruly.
Luckily, Pythagorus was on our side and we were on the same side of the region, due east of our foes. At the beginning my enemies complained about the lack of minerals on the map suggesting that I increase them to at least 5000 a patch. The game name was 2v2 Newbies No Rush...I had obviously gotten what I had asked for.
Me and me ally scouted with peons and I began a two gate zealot build...I wasn't going to rush but I am paranoid. I could feel an enemy doing a great injustice to the game name and rushing me full force. I was going to be ready.
CureBoi built not a unit. He busied himself with getting a hydralisk den (he's too good for zerglings) and planning to throw down some sunkens until he gets a suitable force. But before he gets his first creep colony a lone marine of the top right orange walks in the zerg hive cluster like he owns the place and starts blasting. Without a single combat unit to fight him he somewhat does.
Rather than pull drones from their duty, CureBoi begins getting a sunken colony in full view of the head- strong private snarling curses the whole time. I informed Super_Zealot to cease and desist this obvious rush. (Whether this counts as a rush or scouting with guns is debateable but I wanted an excuse to use the zealot army I had been amassing)
The sunken finished the marine was dead and I was grinning broadly as a orange marine walked into my base. Seven zealots were too much for him. After informing CureBoi that I was going to surgically remove orange from the map (which he was delighted to hear) I moved my ten shiny new zealots towards the top right. I was in the bottom left and my path took me very close to my yellow advisary. His units (as later reports would show) acted on their own accord and attacked my zealots in transit. The zealot lives up to its name. So fanatical was this group to my move orders, they ignored the gun fire pinging off their shields and maintained course to the heart of Super_Zealot's base. I changed their orders.
In a flash of blood, flames, rifle rounds, and psi blades I took out yellows entire infantry division as his medics ran into a bunker for dear life. After a few menicing attackes on the bunker to show the protoss are foes to be reconed with, I returned to the orange death plan unabated but wounded. After a quick gg from The_Floyd, my yellow opponent, he left.
Well, needless to say the Exectuor laughed hard and the Cerebrate was glad but we wanted orange. The zealots died in vain...I didn't kill a unit...Yellow's sacrifice saved orange by buying him time to build a bunker and some firebats. But all we needed was time.
I continued building zealots and later moved to dragoons. My cybernetics core was warping in the whole time my failed pseudo-rush was taking place. CureBoi had build two sets of three sunken colonies and a good number of hydralisks by this time. Suddenly, orange sent a force of firebats and medics to kill my entire force.
I cried for help from the start. I knew my ally wouldn't be there until it was too late. But...strangley enough...they didn't attack. They just kept walking. Psiblade hit after psiblade hit and they kept walking. With a quick nm to CureBoi the threat was nothing but pools of blood.
CureBoi moved his hydralisk force right next to the enemy base and spread his overlords in a wide network to watch all points around him. I foolishly never expanded but kept getting abilities and upgrades.
My observers were really the master stroke. I watched infantry stand outside his bas asking for one of my psionic storms. I gave them what they asked for. I even gave them two. After this he put his broken army into bunkers. My observers documented every move. He had one missle turrent near the front of his base. One. Thats all. Not other detection. I put and observer IN his base and watched him lift off the command center and make a nuclear silo about the time his medics were blinding all of CureBoi's overlords. I watched his wraiths building.
Then with I watched with glee as my ally morphed those hydralisks right outside his base into lurkers. This was won for certain now. AS everyone knows, lurkers own terran infantry even when they are seen. He has nothing to effectively fight them except for wraiths. I dropped off three high templar right next to them and psionic stormed them to oblivion.
CureBoi moved his hydralisks around the enemy bunkers and went straight for him primary structures. He tried to nuke where the hydras were but I warned and the ghost died. My 24 zealots and 8 dragoons in stark constrast went straight for the bunkers and walked right throught them with narey a moment wasted. In his deathrows, Super_Zealot thought the amount of hardward ripping his base apart was inpossible and asked for shared vision. I obliged. The lurkers never got put to good use. They took out to supply depots while accedentally killing my zealots the whole time.
Lessons Learned:
1) What you enemy doesn't know will hurt him :) He kept scanning my base in the same spot so I simple set my rally points just out of range of that point. In the words of Capser: "Never know what hit him."
2) When a medics runs the gamut of enemy bases trying to blind every detector on the map expect something that cloaks and undo all their hard work.
3) When an enemy makes a reference about acts performed upon his own genitals at the beginning of a match, kill him soundly with no mercy and laugh when he finally dies.
| | Battle Shots! | 
This marine is writing checks his army can't cash.
Yes...all of those little dark spots are burrowed hydralisks.
Behold! The massive fleet of the terran force...2 min prior to psionic storm
I love Easter, but I wouldn't take my kid on this kind of egg hunt.
A joint storming of the castle brought our enemy to tears.
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