"You guys are funny. Don't play terran vs toss on island= good joke."
-OrcManiac
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| GoSu Lvl 17 UD vs T3h L337z0r lvl 27 NE MAgician!! | | | Author: | | | IP: | 204.113.XXXX | | Date: | 05/13/04 10:05 | | Game Type: | Warcraft 3 | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 2, Max: 5, Min: 4
Lifetime Rating for Lord_AAY: 4.5000 |   | That's the sort of title that makes you want to piss your pants iwht excitement, doesn't it? Well.. here is another EFFORTLESS and HTML-less BR!! (Not-unlike the other one I posted.. if you enjoyed this type my name in the BRbrowser and read my strarcraft one!)
The game started on the all too faimiliar map of challeng-Err.. Lost Temple? Ok yeah lost Temple. I, started at the top of the map, while my NE opponent (ChumpBl0ck) started at the bottom. I sent my 2 acos to mine and the ghoul to harvest BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH who the Hell wants to read that sort of shit OVER and OVER?? We all know the gosu strategies by now and DONT need to read them over and over. Why not put this into First person view??
[b]T3h 1st Ghoulz View![/b]
Eat... Kill and Eat.. Those acolytes.. they Look fresh.. NO! Must obey master.. Must mine wood... Ahh.. 2 of my comrades have come to make my job easier.. Why the F*** did the altar get summoned right infront of my wood-mining path?! No matter.. Here comes the GoSu DK! And there's one of those vile SPider things... WHy would ANYONE want to mass that? What the fuck is that?! A horned and bearded centaur?? ATTACK! *glark* what are all these vines doing around me?? Can't move! eat... Kill... *blarg*
And so the early rush succeeded in taking the life of one my ghouls.. but I now had a nerubian defense as well as 2 crypts and 4 spiders, and my main base was being upgraded. I fought back the KOTG and decided to creep alittle, so I went to the middle of the map and started clearing out the mobs in a clock-wise fashion. After getting to the southmost spawn, I was assaulted by about 7 huntresses and that blasted KOTG....
[b] t3h Death Knights View of Things[/b]
All we do is kill the damn gnolls and trolls.. what is the point?! I want to kill that blasted centaur thing or something! Oh great, another useless "hide" cloak. I already have one what the hell do I need 3 for?! Ahh! there's the centaur! what are all those black cat things? Oh well They all die the same... Attackz0r!
And so my 6 crypt fiends and his 7 hunts engaged in a deadly dance of Micro warz. I lost a crypt fiend because the DK was too far to Coil in time, but then for about 10 seconds the Hunts DIDNT focus fire and I managed to get so many down on health that he was forced to retreat. I followed him up until his base, where his moonwells (and a newly built DH) forced me back to base, but not before burrowing one of the spiders for scouting. after leaving his base I doubled back to his would-be expo hole to find it occupied by creeps, so I ran over to mine and cleared it out. Oh WOW Scourge Chimes.. So Useful. Atleast I got the Dk to lvl 4. By ths time more fiends had joined me ( to make a total of 12) and I was well on my way to getting statues.. So I decided to visit his expo again to check up on things. Still Occupied.
I decided to pay his base a visit, and managed to get one of his moonwells before he TPED(!) back with a force of no less then 9 huntresses. I promptly retreated, but when a statue glided over to my DK, I decided it was time to end this. I circled around to the front of his base and focused on his wisps(so they would suck up the moonjuice) but was quickly met with the glaive action of the hunts. I managed to surround and destroy the KOTG but took some heavy losses and decided to run for it. At this point a force of about 4 archers met me on the opposite side of his base and I was forced to TP to save my ragtag army of 4 badly wounded crypt fiends. My tp was followed by a Cry of "YEAH THATS RIGHT U RUN U NIGGER LOVIGN SLUT" but Seeing my base had 6 more fiends as well as 2 towers and 2 meatwagons brightened my mood some. I bought myself an orb of corruption and skeleton wand, and ran back to his base. I rolled the wagons up and assaulted his moonwells, drawing out an unholy force of 11 hunts 2 MGs and the 2 previous heroes joined with a new one.. the warden! I burrowed all my fiends and Used hide on the Dk to make the wagons seem vulnerable, and rolled back into the middle of my ambush. only about half of the hunts followed, while the rest loitered around the wounded wells. I rolled until the hunts were right in the middle of my circle of death and sprang the trap, quickly eating out all 6 huntresses, who were still vainly trying to get the ever-escaping wagons. I then doubled the wagons back and began anew.
This time my wagons were met with 2 glaive thorowers, so I knew the time for stealthy assault was over. I launched my 4 statues, lvl 5 dk, 16 spiders and newly built Crypt lord at the KOTG, stunning him with the spike ramming and finishing him off with death coil. I then turned my sights on the warden, who up until now was happily Fuc-er I mean FoKing my fiends into oblivion. The statues were doing a grand job of keeping my fiends alive, but had taken heavy damage from the Dh and hunts. I attacked the huntresses farthest from the moonwells with my fiends, hoping to finish them off, but the bastard quickly retreated back into the base. I glanced back into my bse to find the 5 wagons I had ordered rolling up behind my 2 old ones, and renwed my assault..
Come on. You know it's over. 0 Unarmed armor vs 7 Meatwagons? Pwn'ed. My fiend directed their attention to the MG's, who had been stuck behind the AoW and had been unable to attend the previous assault. My wagons bombared the hunts, taking them down 1 volley at a time. His base decimated, He proceeded to calling me Hacking n00b and a host of other things, And as I destoryed his last moonwell I too unleashed a tongue lashing I shall not mention here directly at him ( and his mother ).
But I was crestfallen to find that He did NOT recive a Game loss, but instead continued to abuse my eyes with more Aknowladgements of my horrible palying. I started pumping gargoyles for fast scouting as My fiends and heroes paid a visit to the expo place, which was still Filled with mobs. I cleared it out to fett my lord some XP and then proceeded to circle the map in hopes of finding the tiny path into the forest leading to his hidden tree base. I l ran and crawled and flew around but to no avail.. it was as if the tree was moving atround and avoiding my guys with super-tree speed! I looked at the minimap in despiratin when I saw a glimmer of hope: The burrowed spider I had abandoned So long ago was detecting a slowly moving tree eating it's way into the forest very close to where he lay in wait. My horde of gargoyles bombared the forsaken Tree fort and were once again met with the Abcense of a VICTORy message. I returned to my desperate Minimap browsing when I saw somethign that made me shout "OMG I Suxx0r"! I clicked back to my base to see, around the heavily cut up lumber, a small path (and I mean small, the ghouls had been busy) leading to a tree slowly eating it's way off my screen. I engaged it with my ghouls and acolytes, but the tree fought back and killed them all (all the while I was being called n00blar and such). I crowded my gargs around it, and in no time at all the tree was down. I sighed and leaned back in my chair as the all-too familiar VICTORY j00 PWN HIM message was displayed.
There. No Pictures. No HTML. It's all left up to your imagination. Once again I state that you could have seen soem hunts getting raped.. but I belive it's better to visualize the fun, since looking at the pictures will make u want to play wc3 more and more, but u know u cant since ur sitting at your cubicle job while ur boss shouts at u to get that report on why employee morale is down in.
Before you click the comments button and Proceed to flame me with things like DIEDIEDIE and Blammed and Kill the author and non flaming spam like 1st! and 2nd!
Remember this ancient proverb:
[b] I'm Rubber and You're a Sack of shit. At the end of the day, guess who is more desirable to the opposite sex?[/b] |
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