"I have to admit I don't know a whole lot about this guy, cept that I obsed a few games with him, in which he's been suspiciously quiet. He seems to be very gm - perhaps a little overly so - and actually destroyed his scvs, floating his CC away over the nearest sea. Meanwhile I opted to scv dance round the closest geyser."
-|]agomar
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| Lets Try This Again | | | Author: | | | IP: | ip68-12-XXXX | | Date: | 08/04/03 08:08 | | Game Type: | Other | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 6, Min: 6
Lifetime Rating for Malik: 6.0000 |  | Sorry about the other one, it was my first time posting here and I wasn't sure what to do. I've checked the option for replacing my characters or something, as a comment suggested, so hopefully this will help...Here we go.
“What’s it doin’ there?” asked Deekon Harrison.
“Sittin’” proclaimed Kevin Albright
“Well, of course its sittin’, but why is it sittin’ there?” asked Deekon.
“Hmm, dunno.” Said Kevin.
“Alright, enough brilliant speculation by you two,” spoke Cecil, the de facto leader of the small group of friends in the valley that evening.
Cecil, a man of small build but large personality, had asserted himself as leader of the trio earlier in the day, when he had stated that they would spend that night in the valley outside of town, to watch the starts and find out if there was a God. Cecil had not explained how the stars would prove the existence of God, and in truth was not sure himself. He felt certain, however, that one way or another, they would.
His hope had been buoyed by the finding of the subject of his friends’ current debate. Sitting in the middle of the valley, within a perfectly formed circle of rocks, was a small metal plate, square shaped and gleaming, looking innocent and quite smug in its lack of explanation. Seeing this, Cecil had quite immediately decided that the stars had sent their message, and it was contained, somehow, within the perfectly shaped anomaly.
“Maybe we should move it?” offered Deekon, one of Cecil’s hastily-chosen companions.
“Such an action cannot be taken rashly, Deek, we may very well have the secret to the universe here.”
“Well, then we should go get it,” said Deekon.
“Not yet, let me peruse it first.”
“Peruse all you want, after I’m done gettin’ that secret outta it,” said Deekon
“And what would you do with the secret to the universe, Deekon Harrison?” asked Cecil
“Well…I s’pose I’d sell it,” said Deekon.
“Sell it!” shouted Cecil, indignant, “To who?”
“Billy Graham, maybe, or NBC. If they won’t buy it, then I’ll bet the Jews will, they’d love to have a thing like that,” spoke Deekon
“I think I should touch it,” said Kevin.
“You can’t sell the secret of the universe, it’s for everybody, your soul would be forever stained were you to do such a thing!” preached Cecil.
“Well, t’was me what found it, and it’s me what’s gonna get it, so I don’t see how it’s any of your business, anyway!” exclaimed Deekon.
“Not my business!” raged Cecil, “I’m the one who brought us here to find this exact thing. To find it, and to give it to the world so it can be a better place for mankind to live in!”
“I’m gonna touch it,” said Kevin.
“Well, the world can be a better place after the Jews give me my money,” said Deekon.
“You think the Jews ,as a collective entity, are going to come together, have a meeting, pool their money, then spend it on a secret of the universe offered by you?!” asked Cecil.
“Well…that’s the plan as it stands so far, yes,” spoke Deekon.
Kevin touched the plate.
Kevin went away.
“Well, I’d say your plan is fairly stupid, Deek,” spoke Cecil.
“Well, I’d say YOU’RE fairly stupid, Cecil,” said Deekon.
“Well, I’d say you’re…you’re…” Cecil trailed off. He had noticed Kevin was missing.
“Where’s Kev?” asked Deekon, noticing at the same time their friend’s unexplained, but very dramatic and well played, exit.
“Perhaps the force of such a tremendous discovery for mankind crushed him into particles the size of quarks,” speculated Cecil.
“Maybe he exploded,” theorized Deekon.
“Look,” said Cecil, pointing at where the metal square had been, “the plate’s moved.
Sure enough, the metallic cube had shifted one foot to the left, revealing what lay beneath.
Below the metal plate was a rectangular box with a bright orange ribbon tied around it.
“That’s the secret of the universe?” asked Deekon, “hell, I coulda figured that out.”
“I think it’s inside the box,” said Cecil.
“Ahh,” said Deekon, “So…should we open it?”
“I think we’d have to” spoke Cecil.
“’K then, go ahead,” prodded Deekon.
“I believe this is more in the area of your expertise,” said Cecil.
“Oh no, I’m not getting crushed into particules the size of quartz,” declared Deekon defiantly.
“Then how do you plan to ransom your money from the Jewish community at large, Deek?” asked Cecil.
Deekon considered this, then said, “Fine.”
Deekon untied the ribbon and opened the box.
Deekon went away.
“Hmm,” said Cecil aloud, speaking now to an audience of curious gophers his discussion had attracted, “now what could all this be?”
Determined not to be thwarted by his companions’ as-yet-undiscovered and almost certainly rather unfortunate fates, Cecil took a step nearer the lidless box and looked within.
Inside the box was a collector’s edition DVD of the 1974 season of The Price Is Right.
Cecil was enraged. All this work, and nothing to show for it but a show so old and horrible that no person below the age of seventy would possibly stoop to watching it, and even should said person met the age requirement, they would have to have suffered horrible neglect by their children, nay, their children AND their children’s children, so as to drive them into the necessary depressed stupor required by the laws of man and God to find solace in a show such as this. Bob Barker’s smug, soulless face mocked Cecil from the opened box. “Come on Down!” he seemed to say, but Cecil feared to go where his companions had gone.
Cecil turned to leave, giving up on his dream of the night to find other things to amuse him. He had taken a few paces, when his mind began to bend. What could The Price Is Right possibly have to do with the secret of the universe? Would he be forced to guess the value of the human soul? Or perhaps he would be welcomed into the arms of a beautiful, if somewhat sleazy, female co-host of God. Cecil knew that the uncertainty would haunt him the rest of his life, so, reluctantly, he turned back to the box, and to his fate. As he walked, the question ran through his mind endlessly. What could The Price Is Right have to do with God, What could The Price Is Right have to do with God?
Cecil bent over the box, and looked into the infinite void of Bob Barker’s eyes. He asked aloud his question to the DVD case, “What does The Price Is Right have to do with God, the universe, or the meaning of life?”
Cecil touched the case.
“Oh,” said Cecil
The End
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