I am going to report on a game I played in Counter-Strike. Don't like the intro? Too bad. CS, for short, is the most popular online game there is and it's the main reason why Half-Life is so popular after all these years. CS is a game about Terrorists and Counter-Terrorists and the objectives they have to complete. From rescuing hostages to planting bombs, saving VIPs to… ummm… planting bombs, but most people just try and kill each other instead of completing the objectives. Well that's my version of a short introduction so lets get onto the game. I joined a CS east coast community server, which was currently on a map called Office. CTs need to rescue the hostages in the office while the terrorists have to guard them. There are 3 main ways of getting in: The front and the two side entrances.

Now this game is the fourth game I would be reporting on so I needed to do some research. Scanning through all the activities done by Mark4 on his computer, I found Bob The Newt's AIM screen name. Luckily for me he was online when I found him. We had some confusion at the start of the conversation, with a lot of four letter F words being thrown toward me, but we got underway. He gave me some tips and, to show my appreciation, I threw a couple of four letter F words back at him and quickly signed off before he could respond. Thanks Bob!

Anyway I joined the server just in time. Round 7 had just gotten underway and I wanted to catch up with one of my teammates. I joined CT, I quickly bought a MP5, some armor and caught up with him. We wanted to go around the side into the office complex through a lift door, but we would not go unchallenged. As the lift door opened, a terrorist popped out of a hallway behind my teammate. I quickly capped that fool and checked to see if any more were in the hallway. Another terrorist was running down the stairs so I blew his brains out (literally). My teammate and I reloaded, ran to the courtyard via the lift door, and were ambushed by another terrorist (I will called them Ts from now on). I took out the T but, sadly, he already got my teammate. I grabbed the dead Ts gun and ran up the flight of stairs to find another T that was looking town at the courtyard. I pop him in the head and run into the hostage area. At this point I have only one teammate alive and one T still on the loose. We both take 2 hostages and run toward the hostage rescue area. He was running in front of me when a burst of blood came from his body and he fell silently on the floor. I quickly figured out that the T was camping the hallway just outside the hostage area. I quietly sneaked around to find him trying to make some pop-tarts near a microwave. After I busted a cap in his ass the round was over.

This round I wanted to go around the side a different way. I followed one of my teammates through the side of the building until we had to go up on a ladder (AKA Unholy Ladder). He went first and as soon as he got up, "he got dead" and went flying back. The T that shot him jumped out the window and shot me in the head. This is one of the most annoying things that can happen to you in a game but you have to learn to live (or die) with it.

Round 9- I went the same route I had in the first round but this round was going to be a little different than the first. I ran up unchallenged until I got into the hostage area. There was a T with an AWP camping the hostages with his gun barrel pointed at me. Luckily he missed the first shot and I ran toward him with my MP5 making him run away like a little Japanese schoolgirl. We had a little chase around the office but then we confronted each other. I shot 3 rounds but then the gun went empty. The T took out his pistol and started firing but he needed to reload too, so we both ran to find some cover. I changed to my pistol, ran to get him before he reloaded, shot 3 rounds in his chest at point blank range and killed him. Then I ran around the halls looking for any Ts that were still alive. I ran to the front of the building where an angry T was running around. I quickly cooled him down and waited for the round to end.

The next round finally arrived and I ran with a couple of my teammates to the "Unholy Ladder." We swooped in and I saw a friendly face. It was the same person who popped me in the head in round 8. I exacted my revenge but I had to save my cheers for a later time as there we 3 Ts in the hallway just outside the office that I was in. Luckily they were distracted by one of my teammates out at the front of the building. I cap one while another runs behind a tipped over fridge. Then he comes back and I take out this fool too. I run toward the dead bodies to inspect and spray them (spraying bodies is a form of disrespecting players and showing that you "pwn" them). Out of another hallway a T pops out and starts firing at me. I think he was trying to kill me but he didn't go far. I capped that fool and sprayed his ass. After that I ran around until all the Ts died.

Round 11- I wanted to go and assault the building head-on. I ran up to the hostage area and saw 2 Ts running toward the courtyard while shooting at me. I get one of them in the head while the other one escapes. I run behind some cover reload and chased the other guy. I saw him covering his teammate, which was in the courtyard. I quickly took him and his teammate out and the round was over.

It was time to sit back and watch my teammates do stuff this round. We went up through the side of the building, where a very fierce firefight broke out. It lasted about 10 seconds and left 3 Ts dead on the floor. We then went to the hostage area where we were ambushed. One CT died while the other one was very confused. I took out the ambushing T and the round was over.

Round 13- I run to the courtyard by myself and capped a fool who was camping in a spot where he thought he could do me dirty and get me from the back… hehe. I showed that sucker… wait, huh? Aww shit.

Round 14- Hmmm. I will try and avenge myself this round and go into the courtyard again. I will kick ass and chew bubble gum… Wait! Aww horse shit! This is what happens to you when you try to go in Jet Lee style and kill everyone in the building by yourself.

I was a little tired of being the good guy (CT) so I join the dark side (T)… After all, the Ts did get raped pretty bad when I was around. I bought myself the all-powerful gun and some armor and went to block some CTs that were coming in from the side (Unholy Ladder). I hid behind the tipped fridge and when I heard them coming I ran out and …

Round 16- This round I was going to stay put and guard the hostages. I bought an AK and armor and waited for a while until one CT finally came. I shot him up and wandered around the hallways like a nomad until I found two CTs running to get the hostages from the back. I shot one in the back while the other one turned around and returned some fire. I capped him before he did any serious damage and then a stupid newbie pops out from a hallway and takes a pot shot at my head. Sadly, my head wasn't strong enough to withstand the hit.

Next round I went through the courtyard, though the CT base, and out front with my handy dandy AK-47. I jumped on a windowsill and shot at a CT running around. He shot back and left me a 20hp. He would be punished severely for this.

Round 18- This round shows off what "smart" people can do as an alternative to having a firefight. Me and another teammate camp, I mean guard, a hallway, which goes the hostage area. My teammate killed a CT but who cares. Another CT jumps out of nowhere and chucks a Flash Bang grenade at us. I couldn't see shit so I emptied my clip into the hallway in a strategy called "spray'n'pray." The only thing my bullets did is make, what looks like, a happy face in the hallway. Did I mention that the CT kills both of us?

After that, the map timed out and we went on to the next map. Some of the scores don't add up and there is a reason for that: I forgot.