"Let all the pics load ( it's about 1.5 megs of stuff =[ ), or I'll give ducky your phone number and house address"
Bob_The_Newt
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| Art Class | | | Author: | | | IP: | 1Cust45.XXXX | | Date: | 07/12/02 08:07 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 7, Min: 7
Lifetime Rating for mick: 7.8627 |  |
Art Class
This is just a fun little report, I hope you enjoy it anyway :]
With the evolution of Starcraft Map Editors, you can't help but notice the constant flow of quality new UMS maps.
A few nights ago I took time off from my meleeish newbie-expertness and swapped it for UMS expert-newbieness. As I changed the game filter to "Use Map Settings", I was overwhelmed not only by the number of games but also the variety of popular maps.
Hrrrmmmmm, what to choose... there is Flopsy The Cow, Kerrigan NAKED, or how about the up and coming DON'T LOOK DOWN!.
Those all sound like hours of fun, but a different game altogether drew my attention,
I joined the game and noticed the 4 other players. We all loosened up with a few "lol"s and since the creator (KeViN) was reluctant, I offered to be the judge in his place.
 
After familiarising myself with the judge's unique abilities, I explained the how I would be scoring, followed by the first visual task for the budding young Renoirs - A Zealot.
After 5 or so minutes, the 4 Picassos had finished their works.
1st place and 2 points went to Seed_Ling for his balanced use of textures and toning. The way the eyes stare at you reminds me of the Mona Lisa - no matter where you stand, they follow you.
2nd place and 1 point was awarded to BlackHelmetMan. The almost perfect symmetry of the subject makes it stand out from bloodshed of the battlefield-background. The raised blades intimidate you as they pull you closer.
Both runners up were still very impressive. hoy.dirtymonkey's "Zealot" moved me. Aware of the impending Zerg swarm, the young warrior stands in a crucifix pattern letting a single tear roll from his closed left eye.
(KeViN)'s obvious satirical piece is not to be scoffed at. The inclusion of his favourite childhood character "Lamb Chop" allows for an all round enjoyable piece.
The presentation was swift and our Michaelangelos were eager to continue.
Riddled by gentle/friendly mocking, our quartet of Da Vincis second task came to an unrushed end.
Once again, Seed_Ling took out 1st with his focal enginuity. Although the title is "Spoon", the Fork is built up to draw your immediate attention, saving the best for last
In a tight race for 2nd, hoy.dirtymonkey just pulled ahead with his controversial piece, "Outcast Cutlery".
BlackHelmetMan put a little too much work into the harmony of colours, forgetting that a spoon is just a spoon.
In a grossly misplaced display of creativity, (KeViN) documents the ancient scribings of the ancient Australian Spoon tribes. The markings have not been translated since their discovery in 1906, making for terrible subject matter.
With such a superb display of talent so far, I thought I should tone it down just a little. The new subject for our Rembrandts was to be something universally recognised - a Star. The star of course being symbolic of the artists heart & soul.
While they worked to produce extensions of their souls, I explained that should star pupil Seed_Ling win this round, we would declare him the winner but also hold a race for 2nd.
Some time later, our Monets finished up the third task.
Expecting no less, I was given a treat courtesy of Seed_Ling. The 6 edges of the star representing the 6 most important parts of the male body(inc. the soul ;p).
In a suprising turn around, (KeViN) let his emotion flow into his work, producing the 2nd place winning "star". With a generous glimpse, you can see that this piece reaches far back to (KeViN)'s fond memories of Christmas until the year he found out Santa shops at K-Mart and buys yellow shirts that say "dood".
Even though there is no possible way to judge a "bad" depiction of ones own soul, BlackHelmetMan & hoy.dirtymonkey's just plain sucked.
So with Seed_Ling the stand out winner, it was down to the 3 Van Goghs, all on 1 point, to compete for 2nd place.
I set the 4th and final task, giving the 3 remaining Matisses a limited free reign of subject choice.
The competition was fierce with all 3 Botticellis choosing unique subject matter.
I grinned with excitement as time drew to a close.
BlackHelmetMan took 1st place with his new style of still life capture. The wrinkles on the face show imperfection of a seemingly perfect subject. When you look at it, you get the feeling it is speaking to you.
(KeViN) went for a mix of new and old, combining Raphael's deilcate "Madonna on the Rocks" with the late 20th Century pop-art craze. They come together offering a gentle message that can be taken in many different ways.
hoy.dirtymonkey's work loses marks for incorrect subject matter. The abstract piece shows a young womans love for her pet kitten, oh how she likes to play with it, stroking and stroking.... THE KITTEN that is.
The overall results were final - First place Seed_Ling, Second of course going to BlackHelmetMan and Third being snatched up by (KeViN) leaving poor old hoy.dirtymonkey last, making him the worst artist in the history of the Universe.
The Exhibition came to a close and the artists each chose their separare careers.
There is not much use for a burnt out art critic on Battle.Net, so I went and demolished a Terran with nukes before calling it a night.
www.isotoxin.net/~bwh
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