"this is so fucking bad I want to kill myself and then in my will leave a request to have you banned from the internet."
-Fox^1
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| 1x1 hilarious!! | | | Author: | | | IP: | npcomet.XXXX | | Date: | 03/06/01 01:03 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 5, Min: 5
Lifetime Rating for Stonehead: 5.0000 |  | I am sorry that there are no pics for this report, but, i didnt think i would be reporting it because it is so retarded, but it is also very funny at the same time..
It all started when...
KsuthKos was badmouthing topdoggy in chat.
He started by saying how much he owns topdoggy and how much of a newbie he is. So topdoggy challenged him to a 1x1. Right before they were about to join the game I was invited to obs the game.
So, they played Lost Temple. topdoggy was terran and at 12:00, and KsuthKos was toss in the 9:00 position. I noticed topdoggy's strat was rather, well, gay. He had 6 scvs on min and went for an early vespene collection. He then started building 8 supply depots before building a rax or anything.
Menawhile, KsuthKos had 14 probes on min and was just starting to get gas while he had 4 zealots. He had started by scouting with one of his first probes. He found me first, then went to 3:00, he ended going up to topdoggy's position and did some major damage by hit and run with his probe. He would attack a scv and when he started getting attacked he would go to topdoggy't natural and recharge its shield and go back for more. he took out 4 scvs before he was through.
This might explain why topdoggy had so few scvs but it doesn't explain the 8 supply depots.
topdoggy then after being discovered and noticed that he was doing so bad, lifted off and moved to 6:00. When he saw me there, he CONTINUED! to move it to the 3:00 position. I thought this was the dumbest thing i had ever seen.
KsuthKos had a zealot in the middle of the map just sitting there and saw the moving of the base. He continued with that zealot to the three o'clock position and reached it before topdoggy. So, topdoggy proceeded to the lower right corner island. by this time, KsuthKos had done not much but was insistent on following the hovering command center and was building nothing. He had his 6 zealots now and was doing nothing! A few minutes later, topdoggy reached his final destination and tried to rebuild. He had only enough res for 2 more scvs, so it took him awhile to get going.
At the beginning KsuthKos had gone random and admitted to me through player chat that he had never played toss before. So, he did not know how to go air. This is why he could not attack topdoggy yet. So, KsuthKos went along building every building until he got a stargate and found out that is what meakes air things.
The whole time I was obsing i was pretty much on the floor laughing.
So, next thing i see is KsuthKos moving in on topdoggy's first residence at 12:00 and taking out all of his 8 supply depots. I found this hilarious when i look at topdoggy's new home and see he has built no new supply depots and is massing marines! I then asked him if he had ever played before, and he answered me by challenging me to a 1x1 afterwards! this, just set me off and i had to leave for a few minutes. So, i did not know what KsuthKos did in that few minutes but he had somehow teched up to reavers and had dropped them into topdoggy's island.
Before when i said topdoggy was massing marines, I meant that he was making nothin but marines. He actually had like ten.
Let's recap so far,
topdoggy has:
command center
13 marines
11 scvs on min
2 scvs on gas
1 burning supply depot
KsuthKos has:
all buildings up to a stargate
15 zealots
5 scouts
two dropships
and 4 reavers dropped into top doggy's base
In this, topdoggy's now 13 marines and no more supply depots and was being attacked by 4 reavers. He managed to take out to reavers because KsuthKos was busy taking out the peon line. Then he thought about it and took out four marines before he loaded up his reavers and left.
During this whole ordeal, KsuthKos had made 2 more reavers. and sent them up to topdoggy's base only to find topdoggy trying to make turrets.
he got there just as topdoggy was just starting his first turret. he quickly focused on taking out the marines and then went on to conquer the rest of topdoggy's base.
Later in chat after KsuthKos said gg, topdoggy started saying how KsuthKos hacks and how he didn't play like he always plays. this made KsuthKos very upset and he raped him with words. This made topdoggy leave the channel and after i messaged him once about where he was, he signed off.
this was probbably one of the worst played newbie game, yet at the same time, the funniest.
-Stonehead |
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