"man, he dances around storm like he actually knows what he's doing"
-RS~Darkrogue
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| Discers: The Newbie | | | Author: | | | IP: | ci991207XXXX | | Date: | 01/10/01 09:01 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 4, Min: 4
Lifetime Rating for The Drone Miester: 4.0000 |  | Hello, and welcome to the first of the Discers series. I have only one game to report today, and only one picture, as I only thought of this idea recently when a person disced on me in ladder. Luckily, he got a loss and I got a draw. (Gogo Disconnect = loss setting.)
On with the show.
The game name was 1000- MANNER ONLY. In seconds, a ladderer with the name of Gungee24 joined (Note the cool 24 at the end of his name. Scary scary.) and he had a normal record of 117-52-12. I didn't see anything wrong with 12 disconnects, and there was the disc = loss thing to scare him. His ladder rating was 962, 0-2-0. I didn't suspect anything.
As the count-down started, I saw he chose Protoss. I crossed my fingers for Zerg, as I went random. The map was, you guessed it, Random Oil Dealers Annonomous. No, actually it was LT. The random gods had mercy(About time, too) and gave me Zerg at the 3:00 position. Hoo-ha. I decided to use the strat that the person in AQD3's (Mark4 for you people that just recently crawled out of your holes in the ground) recent BR, the EXP-drone-sunken-hydra strat. I found him in the last place I looked, 9:00, putting an Overlord on his ledge for spying.
My drone did a 1080, furiously grappeled with a zealot (I think it might have made it's shields shimmer, not sure.) and finnaly broke through the Zealot wall he had made at his ramp. I saw a 3rd gateway, gas, (I already had my gas) a forge, another pylon, and a Cyber core warping in. I smell 3 gate zeal/goons or Zeal/temp. I hoped for the former. My drone pooped on the nexus. When it tried to poop on the resisdent police force, (men in armor with large energy swords. MAWLES for short. Thats pronouced Maw-ules.) he got sliced in half. Drones all across space started striking, chanting "Police Gentelness! Down with Police!" Needless to say, they got bored and scattered, some morphing into hatcherys.
But anyway, I put up a hatchery at my ramp and natural, made two sunkens at my ramp and sent two lings to patrol the 12 and 6 o'clock mains and naturals respectivly. I had 10 lings at my natural and started a Hydralisk Den and 2 Evolution Chambers. I was wondering if he was a newbie now, no attacks, no scouting whatsoever. Maybe he was teching. Or assembeling a huge force of death, doom, descruction and greasy hamburgers(yuck). I made more hydras. OK, by now, I have ovies at both islands, a EXP at 12:00's natural, and more drones than the Borg Queen herself. No attacks, no scouting. I was getting worried that this guy was newbie.
I had scouting him before, cannons of the ledge numbering four ate up my scouting lings. I had about 12 hydras at my nat, 5 in my main for intercepting any drops. While I was making drones everywhere, I saw a YELLOW (Thats his color) dot go over into my sight range at my main. I knew it, a drop! I clicked over and... thought, what the HECK?!? It was not a shuttle, but a Flying Hotdog with Mustard. (He's yellow, get it? Hahaha... er... ahem...) I typed "What!?" and sent my hydras to attack it. It's out of range. Wonderful.
I contented myself with destorying the ONE hotdogs bits of mustard (Yellow Interceptors! Hahahaha... I crack myself up...). I made a spire, while thinking of what to do. I thought: "What a newbie! No wonder he lost those games." I sent 12 hydras (I was making more) to attack his base. My spire finished, I started making those flying bats (how do you spell them?). As my hydras arrived, I saw a carrier, 4-5 zeals, and 4 cannons, I killed two cannons, and as they were dying, this happaned:
Incase that picture does not work (arrrg!) He disced as I had 4 hydras left. Siggggghhhhhh..... I hate pubbies.
As soon as I find another discer, Ladder or no, I'll post it (probably only have 1 picture though, as I won't know unti lthe end ;) Also: Watch out for The Newbie. Heres how you can tell if your opponenent is one of the Infamous The Newbie classification:
1. Your opponent does not scout.
2. Your opponent makes tons of Defense.
3. Your opponent does not attack.
4. You win the game.
5. He goes Carriers.
6. When you win, he Disconnects.
Use this chart as a guide to newbies, sex, and life.
Kudos, Cheers, Be happy, Go away, Leave Comments, We are the Borg, you will be assimilated, LEAVE ME ALOOOONEEE!!!!, Sianara, Good bye, STFU NEWBIE I OWN YOU and similiar good byes,
-The Drone Miester
"Broly: Kakarotto!
Goten: Kakarotto? Is that some kind of food? I've never eaten that before.
Broly: KAKAROTTO!!
Goten: I SAID I'VE NEVER EATEN THAT BEFORE!!!"
~DBZ |
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