"How about we start discussing my Small Game Hunters now?
I found it halirious when I got the same type of response every time I play on it.
"Hey I hardly have any minerals left. Are you sure this is BGH$$$?"
"Hey I got jipped!"
"U C*CK-SUC*ING AS*HOLE U CHANGE THE MAP MOTHE*FU**KER!!!!"
-[FLS]Prozerran
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| Don't Click | | | Author: | | | IP: | 128.252.XXXX | | Date: | 11/02/00 04:11 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 0, Max: , Min:
Lifetime Rating for Don't Click: | |
BattleReports.com
Welcome to part two. If you
haven't read part one then you are in the wrong
place and will surely die.
 After trying unsucessfully to
interrupt MasturNate and JPaikman's imbalance
discusions I finally get fed up and say "nate* /
x" and hit the create button. At the
create game screen I am faced with a dilemma. They
played on a non-bliz map before.. I click the
directory named My Maps. Now which one should I
choose. Ring Around the Base is too big for a 1v1.
Rivers of tar is too much like the last map.. Ah,
The First Space Base. Now there is a map. I select
it and hit create. Both players join quickly, no
observers this time, so I hit start and away we
go. But first lets check out this crazy map of
mine. Space Base is a four player, 128 x 128,
space tile map. The map is divided up into four
corners and a center area by a large diamond
shaped catwalk which goes all the way around the
map. In each corner is one main and a nearby
natural. In the center there are four lowered
expansions, one at each corner of the diamond, and
a raised expansion in the very center which is
accesible by two staircases. Also the map is
littered with doodads because I like my maps
decorative.
*Knock Knock* Who the hell
could that be? Didn't I tell you I gave Kate a
call. She said she might stop by. No, I'm
pretty certain you didn't tell me. Hi. Hi Kate.
Kate!! Hey Captain.
Will, Captain Chobo, this is Jamie.
Who? Oh, sorry. She still
has her personal cloaking on. She's a little shy
around strangers. | | *sigh* Hi
Jamie. Hi.
You're a ghost I take it? I knew this one
ghost... Oh look a starcraft
game.
|
|
 |
 After I convince the players to
share
vision, I quickly not that this is
going to be a protoss v terran
match up. JPaikman draws terran in the
upper right and MasturNate gets protoss in
the bottom right. Asside from a little discussion
on what is "manner" by Mr. Nate both players set
about developing their builds. JPaikman goes depot,
barracks, refinery, depot and then begins his
first factory. Meanwhile MasturNate goes pylon,
gateway, gateway, pylon, forge and then finally
begins an assimilator. So, any thoughts?
Terran's got this one in the bag. Ya, 'toss sucks. I don't
know why I asked.
 Anyway, MasturNate finds JPaikman in the first place
he looks and immediately begins causing trouble
with his little robotic friend. The probe targets
the scv which is busily constructing a baracks.
However, before the scv's condition becomed
critical, JPaikman
orders it to stop building and with the help of
another scv the probe is repelled. Meanwhile JPaikman is scouting
counter-clockwise and thus doesn't find Nate's base for some time.
But now, MasturNate has
done a peculiar thing. He has sent another probe
up to join his first and has a zeolot half way to
JPaikman's base. I
wonder what sort of trouble this crafty 'toss
could have in store for José.
| |
 |
 |
 MasturNate's two probes and
one zealot have now all reached JPaikman's base's base and
they gather outside of it. Nate sends one probe in to
check out the scene. The probe finds two marines
guarding the base and decides to make a pylon
right infront of the baracks. The two marines find
this amusing but blast the probe to bits anyway.
They now begin targeting the warping pylon. Now
MasturNate sends his
other probe and zealot into the base and easily
kills the two marines. The zealot and probe now
begin attacking Math.random() supply depot while
JPaikman instructs an
scv to build a bunker adjacent to the warping
pylon. Now JPaikman has
two more marines out and they begin to dance there
asses off in order to distract the zealot from
destroying supply depots. The pylon is now
finished and MasturNate
uses his probe to begin warping in a cannon and
then target the scv building the bunker. The probe
kills the scv but not before the bunker is
finished. The probe now warps in a second cannon
while JPaikman loads
both of his marines into the bunker. But now,
another of MasturNate's
zealots have arrived and both 'lots begin
targeting the bunker along with the probe. Any
thoughts? That's bullshit. Kate? Um.. where's your
bathroom? Jamie?? I think you're out of
chips. Right..
 Now this game is looking like it might
be pathetically short as MasturNate's two cannons are
about to warp in and JPaikman's sole hope for
survival, is a badly burning bunker being pounded
on by two zealots and a probe. But just when all
seemed lost, eight of JPaikman's scvs drop what
they are doing and rush to the rescue. Just then
MasturNate's probe pops
allowing three of JPaikman's scv's to
immediately begin repairing. With the help of a
freshly made vulture the zealots are now quickly
finished. But now, MasturNate's cannons begin
warping in and JPaikman's vulture explodes.
However, by having three of his scvs repair the
bunker and the other five attack the cannons,
Paikman is able to
quickly eliminate the two cannons without further
loss. JPaikman now
sends his scvs back to mining, allowing the bunker
to finish off the pylon. Told you that was
bullshit.
| |
 |
 JPaikman
now begins a second factory while continuing to
produce vultures and marines. MasturNate now has two more
zealots outside JPaikman's base so he decides
to send them in and see what kind of trouble he
can cause. JPaikman has
one vulture and two marines in his base and
through a lot of fancy footwork is able to kill
both of the zealots losing the vulture in the
process. Now both players continue to produce
troops. MasturNate
makes more zealots and sends them to the top of
the ramp leading into JPaikman's base. When JPaikman has five marines and
three vultures, he sends them up the ramp and is
greeted by five of Nate's zealots. The marines
serve as cannon fodder while the vultures get in
some hits. After all of the marines have died
JPaikman uses his gosu
hit and run, spider-planting micro to take out the
zealots, losing all but one of his bikes.
Boooya! Easy there.
 Unfortunately on the other side of the
map, things are taking a turn for the worse for
José, as MasturNate begins warping an
expansion at the upper left natural. Back at home
MasturNate has made
finally finished his cyber core, made a couple
goons and warped in a robotics facility presumably
to eventually get obs since JPaikman now has spider
mines. JPaikman, in the
mean time has gotten an engineering bay and a
missile turret just incase Nate is planing any sneaky
dark templar tactics. MasturNate, trying to
maintain the initiative, sends a couple more
zealots into Paikman's
base. These zealots take a couple of spider mines
but still somehow manage to live long enough to
make José dance. Now
JPaikman decides to
launch an attack of his own and sends two
vultures down to MasturNate's main. MasturNate has two dragoons
and a cannon defending his base, although the
vultures are able to get around these and start
firing on probes. The two vults kill a couple
miners but soon explode to dragoon
fire.
 Now it is JPaikman's turn to expand,
and he does so curiously in the upper left base
just above MasturNate's
expansion which he still hasn't found. MasturNate who is as unaware
of the budding terran expansion as JPaikman is of his, begins
warping in a pylon and then a cannon on the
catwalk above his expand. In the opposite corner
of the map, just outside of MasturNate's main JPaikman instructs two
vultures to begin laying spider mines at the top
of the ramp. Soon three marines and an scv join
the vulures camped outside of Nate's base. MasturNate now sends a probe
out of the base on some mission which will never
be known as it instantly exploded upon reaching
the top. JPaikman, now
realizing that his containment
force has been spotted sends his two vultures and
three marines. In the base they find two dragoons
a particularly beligerent probe on the front
lines. JPaikman's
vultures each plant a spider mine next to the
goons and JPaikman is
able to destroy both the goons and the probe with
one vulture and one marine. But just then a shadow
appears on the horizon...
| |
|
 |
 Yes thats right, MasturNate has been teching
hard and he now has both observers and scouts. His
first scout shows on the scene. The scout kills
the marine and the vulture easily. Now JPaikman's scv has not been
idle. Just below MasturNate's ramp the scv has
constructed a missile turret. Soon two more
vultures and a marine arive to reinforce the
terran structure. The troops run forward but when
they encounter two dragoons and a scout they turn
tail and bravely run away, away. Fotrunately for
José, the two goons
which follow, eat it to a couple of spider mines
planted earlier at the ramp. The scout is forced
to turn back by the missile turret although not
before it kills JPaikman's one marine. JPaikman now has another
marine on the scene though, and he sends it along
with the two vultures back down the ramp where
with some more fancy micro they are able to kill a
dragoon. Now however, MasturNate's other goon
finally kills the damaged vultures. JPaikman now has two marines
on the scene and he begins construction of a
bunker. Unfortunately before his bunker can
finish, MasturNate
comes in with his goons and kills the marines. The
bunker finishes, but there is no one left to go
into it and Nate's
goons raze the defenseless terran
structures.
Now, JPaikman finally
begins building a barracks at the upper left,
which he has been sharing quietly with MasturNate. Unfortunately for
our fearless terran MasturNate notices the terran
expansion first, and warps in a pylon just out of
sight range of Paikman's command center.
Soon the 'toss executor has two cannons warping in
and the terran base looks doomed. He's got
cannons warping in!!! Get your tanks over there!
GOGOGOGOGO!!!! You know he can't hear you,
right? The cannons come out and JPaikman is forced to lift
his command center. Things get worse before they
get still worse as MasturNate brings two scouts
over to finish off the cc, and a tank which just
arrived on the scene dies to a zealot and some
cannon fire.
 MasturNate
begins warping a Nexus in where JPaikman's command center
was, as JPaikman sends
five marines and four tanks across the map to
reclaim the upper left base. JPaikman's tanks seige up and
kill both of the cannons. However, five of MasturNate's goons now arrive
from his main, and he uses his scouts to attack
with the goons. Because of the situation of the
tanks, the dragoons are hit comming down the ramp
and are all turned into soup without killing any
tanks. But now, six more of Nate's arrive, and with the
help of Nate's scouts
which now number three, all of the tanks are
killed. Two more tanks and two marines arrive from
JPaikman's main, and
are quickly slaughtered. Also in the confusion,
the barracks for José
built over there has landed in the corner upper
right corner of the base and began producing
marines. MasturNate
soon finds the rax though and quickly puts an end
to this nonsense with his scouts. Also while all
of this is going on, two of Nate's goons have wanderd
into JPaikman's main
and fallen to Paikman's
gosu vulture micro.
About this time both
players expand to their naturals which I so
thoughtfully provided them with. MasturNate now tries a
serious attack on JPaikman's main consisting of
about three scouts and six goons. Impressively
JPaikman is able to
hold this off with some walled off tanks and
spider mines. However, Nate now finds JPaikman's natural expansion
with his scouts which now number five, and he
begins poping scvs. After several scvs pop, Paikman finally gets his
marines into the supply line to chase off the
scouts. Now JPaikman
sends out another attack force, this one
consisting of six tanks, two vultures and a
marine. The force is presmably headed for upper
left but is forced to turn around in the middle of
the map when it runs into MasturNate's scout force. To
make matters worse on the way back to his base,
JPaikman's run into two
dark templars who some how avoid setting off any
of José's spider mines.
Paikman now has two
goliaths and a couple of medics to help defeat the
scouts, but no form of mobile detection, so he
loses his anti-air to dts and his anti-ground to
scouts all at the ramp to his base. JPaikman now leaves the game
in disgust before MasturNate can raze his
base.
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