"Why does A-X suck so bad? The world may never know ..."
-Mogalin
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| Being Frozen~SCV | | | Author: | | | IP: | sdn-ar-0XXXX | | Date: | 09/01/00 08:09 | | Game Type: | Other | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 6, Min: 6
Lifetime Rating for Frozen~SCV: 6.0000 |  |
Hi there folks! Since I have this extremely long weekend ahead of me, and the only plans I have are to get shitfaced Saturday night, I thought I might give you all a little insight into my personal life. Those of you (Dialtone) who are looking for that wicked BR I was planning on, sorry to disappoint you. Uploading problems along with several other mishaps forced me to put aside that project for now. So sit back, wait for the endless monotone text to load, and enjoy yourself as you read:
A Day in the Life of an SCV.
Actually my real name is Tim, and I currently reside in Daytona Beach, Florida. I have been living here for damn near three years now, and let me tell you, I have never seen more old fogies in my entire life. They’re like ants, you step on one and three more take its place. And their driving, Jesus Christ! I don’t think these people know the meaning of the word “gas pedal”.
Anyway, I am currently 16 years old, and a junior at Spruce Creek High School. My day begins pretty much like every other average teenage boy’s does. I wake up around 5:30, jump in the shower, slap in my contacts, and begin my basic preparations for the coming day. In case you’re wondering, my favorite breakfast food is blueberry pie. That and anything chocolate. I swear to God I could eat nothing but pie and candy for as long as I live.
Normally, I hitch a ride with my pops to school. No, I don’t have my own car yet, basically because I spend most of my free time jacking off with you losers on B.net instead of putting in extra hours at the local Wal-Mart where I am employed as a cart-pusher. Damn all you and your continuous spams of “thx gw.”
Back to the biography. My school is a real nice school and all, except for the fact that we are 46% overcrowded. We have 900 Freshmen…no shit. My day basically consists of seven different class periods, each lasting an hour, and a lunch period. I am particularly fond of my programming class and my weight lifting class. “What!” you say. “Frozen~SCV isn’t some overweight, ho-ho inhaling Internet guru?!” Nope sorry. I am actually a pretty medium sized guy, around 5’7”, with a weight of around 135lbs. It fluctuates a lot. And no, I don’t have eyebrows that resemble Germany’s blackforest, though I did take Deutsche for two years. Sehr Gut!
School is often quite an adventure. I have quite a few friends, though no girlfriend at the moment. What you guys would probably find the most interesting is the language that FaTaL~SCV and myself use daily. Basically, we walk around saying “FAKING SHIET MAN!” and “OOOOOOOooooo AAAAAAaaaaaa” like some kind of crack addicts. Fatal only has one class with me, and that class is scary as hell. No, not because of the content or the teacher. It’s because of the god damn man eaters! This particular class is inside what is called a portable, a trailer home like classroom located outdoors, separate from the major building. There are these huge Cicada eaters that nest around that portable. Not only do they look exactly like wasps, but there as big as my fricken thumb! And their stingers are like harpoons man! Never the less, when one of those beasts sneak into the class, hardly anyone is paying attention to the teacher.
Lunch is also quite an escapade. I usually bring my lunch to school, mostly because I don’t want to wait in the 30 minute lines all the food stations have. I go to the auditorium, where all my friends from drama eat, and cram my food down my throat as fast as I can. After that, I go to weight lifting class. It works out great because weight lifting is right after lunch, so I can go in there 20 minutes early and get a better work out and not have to worry about being late.
Like I was saying, in weight lifting we have some extremely humorous people. First of all are the freshman cheerleaders. Don’t get me wrong, they are damn sexy and I could stare at them for hours, but they have brains with the depth of a tissue. Here is a little excerpt from what actually happened today.
There is this really cute blond girl that I happened to talk to today for the first time. She was holding ten pound weights in each hand when she said this. “Did you know that if you put two ten pound weights in one hand it….ummmpfff…equals twenty pounds?” The “ummmppff” is from where she transferred both the weights into one hand. “Wow,” I say. “You can add.” You can tell I am smooth with the ladies.
The other humorous people in that class, are the freshman guys. They walk around gaping at the steroid driven Seniors and trying to lift way more weight then they possibly can. One guy in particular was always saying that the weight I was lifting was “water weight.” That is, until I told him to shut the fuck up, and he dropped 65 lbs. on his spine doing behind the neck presses. Smart ass. That guy reminds me of Kane for some reason.
Moving on. If I don’t have my dad’s car, (I get it when he goes on business trips) I bum a ride off of one of my friends. Then either one of two things happens. I either A. Go to work, or I B. Go home. Since I want you all to experience first hand the drama that happens at my local Wal-Mart, I am going to assume that I went straight to work.
My job is a piece of cake. There is a remote controlled cart machine that we guide through the parking lot, picking up carts as we move along. Usually there are two guys working per side (grocery side, and general merchandise side), though lately the schedule has been so jacked that there has been as many as 7 people on, and as little as 1. And to think, I get paid $6.25 per hour for walking around…blasphemy! Well, it’s not all that easy. First of all, I live in Florida…Florida people…it’s fucking hot 9 months out of the year! You should see my tan lines!
Anyway, there is this one cart pusher named Gene, who is basically Cynical Magician incarnate. The man is like 35, substitutes at my school for a side job, and fills his free time complaining about how he is so poor, and how he scored some [censored] poontang the previous night. Yes what fun! Then there is Dave. Dave is like 250 lbs, and all the fellow cart pushers nick named him: The Walking Contradiction. Can you guess why? Dave told me one time that he disagreed with people simply because it amused him. An example would be if I said the sky looked stormy (black clouds and the like) and then Dave would totally start in on how it was a beautiful day, even though it is clearly not. He also wears purple t-shirts that are always covered in pink sweat stains. A regular Nordic man he is.
Recently our store was fined quite a large sum of money, due to minors (under 18) having working infractions. So now every manager there proceeds to drill us every time they see us. They are like, WHAT TIME DID YOU COME IN?!!! WHAT TIME YOU TAKE BREAK!!?? WHAT TIME YOU LEAVE??!!! WHAT TIME YOU GO BATHROOM!!!?? WHEN YOU BREATHE??!! WHO ELSE OUT THERE WITH YOU!!?? NO DISC KEKEK!! I shit you not.
After work, I usually go home, unless I went there straight after school. Once home, I grab something to eat and finish up any homework that needs to be done. It is then I log onto StarCraft, where most of you know me as Frozen~SCV, and proceed to block out the day’s events for a few hours. A couple of ass-whoopings later and it is time to hit the sack. The contacts come out, the teeth get brushed, and the bladder gets emptied. And before you know it, it’s faking 5:30 a.m. AGAIN and the routine renews itself.
Well, hoped you all liked getting to know me. I apologize for the lack of pics, hopefully I will have a link to my picture in the comments section or the forum soon, where you can all go and gaze at my lovely portrait. DAMNIT PENGY, not like that bastard! Peace out dogs.
Frozen~SCV Production
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