"...after a few requests to the 10% of the NoHunters channel not currently afk..."
-T.T.boy
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| SMACK-YOSH sMaCkS Proselyte | | | Author: | | | IP: | chf-il-cXXXX | | Date: | 05/07/00 07:05 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 2, Min: 2
Lifetime Rating for lord_beefy: 4.0000 |  | K everybody who's reading this, this is my first report but i plan on doing alot more of them. I wanted to get a good player in so i asked smack-yosh if i could observe his game vs. Proselyte. He was like, "only if you give me oral sex beefy" so i agreed and here's the report! (don't give smack oral sex, it smells)
SMACK-YOSH: ZERG 6:00
Proselyte: PROTOSS 9:00
The game started out with smack making some referances to anal rapages and what not as yosh went 8 ovie and Proselyte went 8 pylon. Yosh's ovie hit the spot right away so yosh decide's that he can risk going to natural expo right away. Then a pool followed shortly after at 11 or 12 drones. At this point Yosh found it nececessary to pause twice. I was very upset and started playing with my fat breasts to pass the time huk huk. After the bad manner pausing was over Smack maynarded 3 probes over to his nat and got another hatch and a hydra den.
Meanwhile Proselyte figuered that goon/reaver would rock out so he went gate- 2 pylon - gas - core - pylon - robo facility. I thought that this was pretty risky becuase he only had 2 zealots vs. yosh's 8 (minus one for scouting) lings at his nat. By the time Proselyte had a support bay he only had 2 zealots 2 goons and because of lag, i had to stop downloading porn. But since that didn't fix it Yosh and Proselyte had to stop to... BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
I LOVE PORN!!!!!!!
From yosh's point of view he had 4 hydras and 3 hatch when he sends his ovie in just a little bit to scout. He sees that Proselyte is a fan of reavers and immediatly gets a sunken so that there would be no where to drop to hit his probes. Meanwhile yosh expanded again at his second natural and decided it was time to attack. But first he somehow saw Proselyte's shuttle just on the very inside of his fog of war and killed it with his now speedy hydras. This whole time yosh has been powering hydras and goes on the offensive.
Proselyte was very upset from his killed shuttle so he decided that reavers and goons own on the ramp. The hydras didn't have very good luck going up the ramp (check the SS below) so he backed off. Then, lucky for Yosh, Proselyte's goons take a shot from on the cliff, but all his hydras (with range) destroyed them from below without the threat of reavers. I think yosh got almost six goons this way then he backed off a little and stood around Proselyte's 2nd nat.
After the first attack Proselyte thought it was definatley time to expand. So he moved a bunch of goons and reavers to help defened along with a cannon. This was not long after the second attack and both forces were waiting for something to happen. The nexus was busy warping in when they noticed that there army's were right next to each other. Right before this showdown occured a goon and hydra were sent to scout the armies respectivly. Yosh not counting on the massive destruction of reavers decided to go at it full force (check pic). All i can say is that yosh took this one 12 inches up there rear. Yosh lost 15-20 hydras and Proselyte lost 2-3 goons. REAVERS OWN!!!!!! Usually this is where upgrading would come into play but both players were so intent on giving and not taking the anal that they forgot. The main lesson of this second battle is you really should right click on reavers. Because those little scarbs do a slut load of damage.
After getting raped so bad Yosh got a couple of more hatch and with a huge mineral advantage ( having 3 bases mining full before Proselyte had 2) he could still power hydra pretty heavy. He also decided that he couldn't afford another reaver rapage so he added mutalisks to the mix. Alot of mutalisks. Getting 2 spire for upgrades, although he never did upgrade it still looked cool, he powered for just a couple of minutes and got ready for battle.
Proselyte was very happy with the resluts of battle number two so he though he was in good shape. Going with more goons and another reaver by his nat he forgot about his main. In come a bunch of yosh's flying fag's to have there way with alot of little probes. Every probe was killed before the stupid goons could get up the ramp to save the precious base. He flew away a little, got more, came back, raped each goon 1 by 1 and then BAM! BYE BYE NEXUS. At this point i think that proselyte decided to wack off because as soon as he saw yosh's hydras coming at him he just sat there and said "raped". I coudln't have stated it better myself unless i were to say, damn those muts bent you over and seperatly had there way your virgin anal cavity and left you bleeding. But i didn't say that and just left it at that. 12 goons were no match for 24 hydra and alot of muts.
Now for beefy's final thought: I love porn. Besides that i think that reavers kick the ass of hydras as long as they have some back up. Mutalisks are very hard to kill when there are alot of them and goon alone won't cut it when they have hydras to deal with too. Good Game smack and good game Proselyte.
apology for no pictures. I took SS's on friends computer. But he's a retard and can't send them over his comp %_% |
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