| #1 jeezumcrow[56233] |
| svwebw03.statestreet.com |
| first heeh havnt done this in a long while |
| #2 Scrode[56234] |
| users2.xorchicago.com |
| woo woo 2! |
| #3 jeezumcrow[56235] |
| svwebw03.statestreet.com |
nicely done, and the game was pretty good. but i am getting that you hate hawk a lot here ? :P
p.s. not to be critical but although i liked brs to be simple, a little more details in the late game or skirmishes would be nice since it lasted 40 or so minutes.
great br anyhow. :) |
| #4 bebop[56236] |
| 24.65.81.66.on.wave.home.com |
um hey confessor
u know how probe is like better than all the forementioned players you should have made him the major!!
that is if the probe u are talking about is probey' =)
good report realy funy about the hawk part
|
#5  [56238] |
| WCS3.NORFOLK.NIPR.MIL |
| OMFG. Boy my soldiers look at me funny when I laugh at reports in the office. Recourses=resources? and T_Mac had the best quote I've ever seen in that report. |
| #6 `~DarKnight~'[56239] |
| 05-170.022.popsite.net |
nicely done.
nicely done.
nicely done.
|
| #7 SqueakyMonkey[56240] |
| osh1-78c.twcny.rr.com |
| Lol, this deserves a 10, just because Heartcutter smashed a 40 over Hawk's head. |
| #8 GammaRayBurst[56243] |
| q.ssl.berkeley.edu |
Wow very nice. An extremely good game with references to practically everyone under the sun.
Excellent.
-GRB |
| #9 Templar569[56244] |
| 168.168.234.60 |
Great report, really funny. Though I can't for the life of me figure out how probes mine recourses . . . :)
I think T-Mac speaks for us all when he says: "All I'm asking for is a little respect, and some head." |
| #10 Fractal_Wave[56246] |
| 24.64.214.37.bc.wave.home.com |
~Rolls on the floor with laughter~
Confess is the MAN.
All the best,
Fractal_Wave |
| #11 Sandman_[666][56247] |
| proxy3-external.rdc1.on.home.com |
ER..... I GOT CONFUSED......
|
| #12 Mogalin[56251] |
| d226-98-102.home.cgocable.net |
| OMg this rocks!!! |
#13  [56252] |
| as530069.infocom.com |
hahahahahaha<i>!!</i>
This report had me laughing from the beginning, "<i>Probe leaped up from under his covers, <b>teletubby in tow</b> and glanced at the unopened files on his desk.</i>"
The Darkhawke interlude was funny as hell and the T_mac quote in that collage made me spit my coke through my nose.
Damn good game too.
Solid 9 from me... :-)
Cheers,
Dref
P.S. No mention of your statue?? |
| #14 probe[56253] |
| 24161239hfc207.tampabay.rr.com |
i enjoy my telletubbies, thank you very much!
i do havta agree with bebop tho, kinda gay that my absolutely godlike skills get put down =p |
| #15 {88}HawK[56254] |
| 209.128.34.3 |
Hahaha ass kissing. gotta love it.
Well I rock all of your newbie asses so who cares?
Ash you lost pvt?
My god.
Only pvt i ever lost was too maynard. |
| #16 wISEST~yODA[56256] |
| pm3-1-151.boscobel.mwt.net |
| hEHEHE BADASS |
| #17 oops[56257] |
| pm3-1-151.boscobel.mwt.net |
capslock sux
|
| #18 SlingsNArrows[56263] |
| bgm-24-95-150-230.stny.rr.com |
This gave me an urge to
1. Reread Ender's Game ( Heartcutter = Mazer Rockham, hero of all humans? I think so.)
2. Enroll in a training school like the one mentioned ;o)and actually learn to play terran.
3. Design a "Harder Bottle" rather than a "Better Mousetrap"
So.. was this in any way connected to Ender's game? If so, have you read the parralel novel Ender's Shadow? Bean's adventures in battle school are better. The rest of the series isn't really related to this though.
Sweet report, clearly 10, because you pointed everything out, too things nice and slow and made everythign clear. I loved it. |
| #19 :BUCKEYE:[56264] |
| dhcp9561206.columbus.rr.com |
1 thing, why 2 different back ground colors?
8.5 |
| #20 Baal_66[56265] |
| p3EE0699C.dip.t-dialin.net |
| Read one of Mark4's reports and you'll know it... |
| #21 Anti-Progress[56267] |
| bay1-21.daktel.com |
| An absolutely hillarious br. I found it enlightening and funny, and at one point I even teared up. I can totaly relate with probe at the beginning when he said "some people can be so cruel". I felt like crying and laughing at the same time. |
| #22 Sonneillon[56268] |
| tsdlsk01d01010125.sk.sympatico.ca |
uh Hydralisk, a LOT of people read Ender's Game. It is usally part of school Science Fiction curriculums.
_________________________________________________________
Oh my, here is another report I almost cried laughing. I loved the alt text. Heh - "die drefsab, you ruined my rep!"
Everything else has already been covered that I needed to say though.
Poor hawk, I wonder if the guy is crying right now... =]
A well deserved 9. |
| #23 The.Confessor[56269] |
| user-2ivelpu.dialup.mindspring.com |
:Buckeye:, the 2 bacgrounds is from the original cattlebruiser report. What itdoes is distinguish the dialogue from the 3rd person desription of the game, that was you dont get confused as to who is saying what and what is merely description. And hawk, this isnt kissing up, it is me unleashing my annoyance with you in br form, enjoy!
-The.Confessor |
| #24 WarLeaderJustin[56270] |
| spider-ti084.proxy.aol.com |
"A fucking A, man."
OFFICE SPACE AND THECONFESSOR RULE!! |
| #25 Phoenix-S-[56271] |
| r-177.123.alltel.net |
OMG this rox!
<center><font color=gold size=100>10</font></center>
P.S. Social skills >>> SC Skills any day! Oh, BTW, Hawke has neither. |
| #26 Deranged~SCV[56277] |
| ci991207-b.edgewd1.ky.home.com |
| GOGOGO HEATCUTER YOU ARE >HAWKHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAHH 10! |
| #27 Dr.Zchivago[56280] |
| proxy1-external.bremtn1.wa.home.com |
Um, this was excellent. What a cool twist on a normal battle report.
Funny as all get out too!
-Dr.Z |
| #28 Spuzz[56288] |
| jfsn-01-193.dialup.netins.net |
Great report. It was the perfect balance between hilarious content and honest to God <i>strategty</i> discussion.
Keep it up!
Spuzz |
| #29 Punck[56289] |
| spider-tj023.proxy.aol.com |
Hardcore ghetto diggy dawg...
Mark4, I'd laugh too if I saw a 25 year oldish military guy reading battlereports =D |
| #30 SlingsNArrows[56297] |
| bgm-24-95-150-230.stny.rr.com |
Sonn, that's where you live perhaps, but not here. Sciece Fiction is considered a worthless genre almost in my area, and is not taught at all. well... we did read a bit of "The Time Machine" but that's all.
Hyd, Ender's Shadow is basically everything going on at battle school while ender is there that ender doesnt' see. It's from Bean's perspective, and quite entertaining. |
| #31 ChinksWithGuns[56300] |
| adsl-63-193-153-8.dsl.lsan03.pacbell.net |
very nice. Do you have ICQ?
-Chinks |
| #32 BW-sux[56307] |
| spider-wa072.proxy.aol.com |
NM, I don't wanna see T_mac in a Tao report.
8
BW-sux |
| #33 Shepherd[56310] |
| cm-24-161-53-47.nycap.rr.com |
I see a few errors here and there. . .
so
9
Nice job, Confessor. The report was flexible, well-flowing. But I'd suggest that you check spellings once or twice before posting. If I ignore those errors, then you would have gotten 10. |
| #34 Volraith[56317] |
| g2k-1-ip-13.albany.thebiz.net |
Good report, i was very interested by T_mac's use of wraiths and dropships. Usually terran players i fight pvt just power metal and try to bust out of containment with tanks and vultures. First BR i've read in a while that introduced new strat ideas to me. Very good job, confessor.
BTW, why do you guys hate this hawk guy so much? From the report im guessing that he is cocky? |
| #35 [56320] |
| 1Cust225.tnt1.rdu1.da.uu.net |
"All I want is a little respect and some head"
T_Mac, despite being a gay canadian man, almost became my idol with that quote. |
| #36 TerranTurtle[56325] |
| pc68dn03.fcc.net |
| Nice. |
| #37 TriggaPlay[56327] |
| spider-to028.proxy.aol.com |
| Malt liquor bottle > hawk |
#38  [56328] |
| dt031nab.tampabay.rr.com |
no lesbians, but still a 10.
in fact, a near nude pic of tmac is just as good. |
| #39 Cyan[56330] |
| spider-ta085.proxy.aol.com |
| ahah hawk is such a loser. He trys to add in hes palyed Maynard whenever he possibly can as if we actually cared. Get a life you retard. |
| #40 Phobos_ColZ[56341] |
| spider-wg071.proxy.aol.com |
| Slings, who wrote Ender's Shadow? Also, great report, 9 easy. No hard, penetrating reavers or fuzzy Bulgarian Lost Temples. but still veyr good. R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Head is what I want for me.... |
| #41 [56343] |
| as530003.infocom.com |
OMG BOB<i>!!</i>
FAVORITISM TOWARDS... TOWARDS... errr, never mind...
Dref |
| #42 -=Rontu=-[56348] |
| 1Cust227.tnt3.provo.ut.da.uu.net |
THE REPORT RULED
ENDERS GAME RULES (my fav book)
btw. what is alt text, never could figure it out? |
| #43 OVERRATED[56367] |
| chi-tgn-gvs-vty35.as.wcom.net |
ROFL, the BEST report ive read in awhile(aside from GRB)
a few spel errors tho but never the less a great BR.
Rontu.. put your cursor on the pics...
|
| #44 Snork~Dimmy[56391] |
| async12-per2-isp-3.nas.one.net.au |
OMG, that was cool, and the terran WON!!!!!!!!!
great game, great report, look forward to your next one, thx gw
9
Snork~Dimmy |
| #45 Flisk[56393] |
| sy-as-07-154.free.net.au |
ROFLMAO
I love apart from the funny bits (especially probe with his fluffy animals) how you put the actual battle in mini black backgrounded chunks. That ruled =]
I have previously read all of Cattlebruiser's reports, except the Training of Johnny Vegas. I think I'll start now after reading this :D Well done<i>!!!</i> |
| #46 DragonValgarv[56403] |
| patty.nawcad.navy.mil |
| Awesome report, some combinations of story and br don't work so well, but this was great! I remember the CB report but this was funnier..<br>BTW that little story about the man and his wife was cool, heh heh. |
#47  [56419] |
| fred126.pci1.cos.pcisys.net |
This was so god dam funny Confessor! OMG I normally don't rate reports until I get to work, but a I am glad I stopped by early to see what's up!!!! WOW Awesome, good idea as well. Dref and I see eye to eye.
9
Fox^1 |
| #48 King-Lewis[56437] |
| modemcable180.145-200-24.mtl.mc.videotron.net |
Nice!
8. |
| #49 SlingsNArrows[56451] |
| bgm-24-95-150-230.stny.rr.com |
| Ender's Shadow is also by Orson Scott Card |
| #50 T_Mac[56515] |
| ares.tdsb.on.ca |
| Omfg this was funny, confessor is the man! |
| #51 Bill[56575] |
| dialup-63.208.69.92.Chicago1.Level3.net |
| Nice report, I liked the whole theme.. I only have one complaint: The alt-text, although usually funny, really detracted from the mood :/ |
| #52 Lieutenant Gurgle-Spunky[56642] |
| ppp96.c5300-1.day-oh.siscom.net |
Lowtax - shit bitch, wes rap on stage in diapahz!
Hardcore - what??
Lowtax - We muthafuckin do gigs in da diapahz, ladiez love it!
Hardcore - WTF????
Lowtax - yeah, we bust shit up on stage, knock shit over and spit all ovah da fuckin crowd when rappin. Snoozy D sometimes brings dis bottle of lemonade and puts it inside his diapahz and fakes ta pisses all ovah da playah hatahs in da crowd and get they ladies all wet (if ya know what ah mean, DAWG)
Hardcore - youre fucked up!!!
Lowtax - the fuck ya talkin bout dawg? you jes like da othah rappahz, you fraid of us. We gon roll all ovah yah and plant corn in yo eyes, wez pimpin shit on da fly yea
Hardcore - shit!!!
Lowtax - yeah, wes do dat too, throw shit around. sometimez we bring grandma on stage an throw shit at her, makes da audience go mofo NUTZ yo, we take grandma and say "YO! SIT YO ASS DOWN YA DAMN BATTY OL BROAD!" and we tip her shit ovah and throw peaches at her azz. shes all bloody an shit, but we pay her stank ass, so it dont mattah.
Hardcore - that fucked up g
Lowtax - SHit dawg, but I gets da ROLLS to pay da billz. you wants me ta ask Jim Bagleaducia about gettin ya on da label?
Hardcore - NO
Lowtax - is no problem G, we hook ya up, ya can play afta us
Hardcore - NO
Lowtax - we'll throw shit at yo face and push chairs ovah on ya, bust shit up an make a scene, da crowd will love ya. well kick ya face in and roll ya around in our diapahz
Hardcore - fuck you, youre fucked up
Lowtax - PLAYAH HATAH
Hardcore - FUck OFF
Lowtax - PLAYAH HATAH!!! PLAYAH HATAH!!!!!!!
Hardcore - FUCK YOU!!!!
Lowtax - DROP YO ZERO AND GET YOSELF A HERO! PLAYAH HATAH!!!!
Lowtax - I USED TO BE FAT BUT NOW IM ALL THAT!!!!!!!!
Lowtax - hello?
Lowtax - hello?
Lowtax - G money?
Lowtax - friend?
Lowtax - hello?
|
| #53 Krebster[56668] |
| spider-to037.proxy.aol.com |
| Hahahahahahah wtf hahaha rofl |
| #54 Heartcutter[56763] |
| activer-2.ussntc.savvis.net |
LOL! Great f'king report. I owe you a 40oz bottle of Old English '800. Hehe.
-HC |
| #55 Findail[56782] |
| 209.4.255.238 |
| I loved this report funny well i guess everyone already said that. |
| #56 CraZy[56852] |
| 24.65.122.105.sk.wave.home.com |
| You lost to me hawk. :[ |
| #57 CraZy[56867] |
| 24.65.122.105.sk.wave.home.com |
| btw hawk did play maynard~~ |
| #58 QuadManiac[56898] |
| spider-wi054.proxy.aol.com |
| question, how the fuck does a stuffed toy making a sickening thud? Wouldn't it be more of a fruity squeak? |
| #59 Activus[57055] |
| sdn-ar-001nyrochP214.dialsprint.net |
So what if Hawk played Maynard, damn I've played a million of those guys, it's starting to annoy me :-P.
Acty |
| #60 BackStabingLiar[57220] |
| 63.239.42.130 |
yeah baby this was one of my favorite reports!
Hawk=confessor's good bitch |
| #61 CyMaN[127687] |
| pD9523EA7.dip.t-dialin.net |
| too bad the pics are gone now 9-30-02 |
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